positronic

the truth for once
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2001-08-25 01:51:46 (UTC)

Yeah. Been a while.

"What had to be done had to be done, I wasn't going to be
disrespected in my own house. When you have to do that you
know it's trouble."
Person who uses cocaine incessantly. A member of my family. I am
at his home presently. The man faces jail every month for non
payment of child support. He's a graduate from NYU and has no
job. He doesn't look. He looks to his computer friends to provide
him with human contact. He borrows money for food. I forget
sometimes that things could somehow be different. But how I
don't know. How is it that I made it through the garbage of our
fucked up life as kids and can keep going? How is it that he can't?
When is he going to fucking change? I'm waiting for the life to get
sucked from him by the pounding of waves that just don't seem to
be coming. Get up motherfucker, achieve, make good on your own
duty to yourself, your talents, don't drain my fucking mother.
You're 32.
His fucking internet life. Looks over my shoulder for his IM's. Wake
up motherfucker. Wake up and smell the stench of your own
clothes after being on the street for one two three weeks,
months. See the sunrise from the aspect of the concrete. Look just
a bit ahead. See something.


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