Bubblehd75

Journey of a Willow
2002-11-30 09:10:56 (UTC)

Your actions echo throughout the eternities

It seems to me that I have no control over myself.
Whenever I play sports or play a joke I have no control. I
don't know when enough is enough. When I play sports I
physically hurt people. Maybe I step on their feet, or run
into them, it doesn't matter. I always find someway to
hurt people and it not doesn't just make me sad, it makes
me angry. Angry that I always do it and have no control
over it.

I can't say why this happens, I don't know. I don't like
it. I have no control over myself and I feel powerless. In
the spirit of fun tonight, I threw my hat at someone. It
ended up splitting her lip and she had to record for the
state High School Honor Band the next day. One time
someone went to jump on my back and I moved causing them
to land flat on their stomach. One time I was wrestling
with a friend and we ended with somehow his nose hitting
the floor, me on top and a lot of blood. Once I played
keep away with someone's shoes and i didn't know when to
stop and they won't even talk to me anymore. These
occurrances aren't few and far between: they are real,
happen often and break me down each time. I hate it.




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