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2001-08-23 05:18:50 (UTC)

God is...

I don't understand how some days being a Christian is so easy
and how other days it is so hard...And it's not the days
when everything in my life is going great that it's
easy...It's the days when I'm paying attention. When I
notice the things around me, like the beauty of a sunset, or
the lyrics of a beautiful song, that's when I feel the
Spirit of God within me...But I think college is a very bad
place to be a Christian...It's just so hard to be part of
the "intelligalista" and believe in God...I struggle with
pride every day. It seems so weak to turn your life and
problems and burdens over to the Lord...But I've been very
suprised at how challenging it actually is...It takes a very
strong person to be confident enough in their faith to trust
in the Lord...My pastor said something to me last Sunday at
church that really struck me as amazing...He said that my
faith is a precious thing and that I should value it as
well...He said that the angels marvel at our faith, becuase
they work for and with God, but we just believe with out
truely seeing or knowing, and that is so amazing to them...I
just thought that was so interesting...

The other thing that really bothers me is keeping religion
and politics separate...Most Christians view things like
abortion and homosexuality as very wrong and things that God
would never aprove of. But my problem is that I know God
gave humans their minds for a reason.....So we could make
choices, and just because I may not personally agree with
every view, it does not give me any sort of right to try to
impose my beliefs on anyone else except myself. Or to
condone anyone for their views and or actions as
well...One of the main teachings of Jesus was to accept
others for who they were as people and be ok with that...I
think churches get so caught up in "religion" that they
forget about why they are really there...I think a lot of
Christians, and other religious group for that matter, just
go through the motions of 'religion' and don't really
examine their personal beliefs about God and regurgitate
what is being fed to them every Sunday morning to anyone and
everyone who will listen...

Okay, enough of that for now....Today was fairly average...M
left for home today, so I won't see him for a week...I'm
actually jealous...One of his best friends went with him, I
was supposed to go, but couldn't because of class...So they
are all out having fun in MN, and I just hate missing out on
stuff like that...Besides when he's out of town, it's always
strange talking to him on the phone...He's very easliy
distracted :) which is no good, because it really forces me
to look at how jealous I can get...Other than that, classes
are going well, nothing's gotten too hard yet, but it's only
the first week so we'll see...I went to dance class tonight
and hated it though, so I don't know what I'm going to do
about that...But I have to be up early, so I'm going to hit
the sack...