starzy

serendipity
2002-11-25 07:39:33 (UTC)

i woke up

I always the one helping my friends with there problems.
But when i was faced with a problem of my own, i didnt know
what to do. I was with a guy for 2 years, i trusted him
with everything, everything. We were "high school
sweethearts" as some would call it. This past summer i went
on a vacation, I came back expecting to be welcomed with
love from him, however, I wasnt. He changed so much. He
told me he didnt know what he wanted. When he said that i
just wanted to die. I emailed him and basically ended it
with him. How could i be with someone that doesnt know what
he wants? when i asked him what he wanted.. i wish so badly
that he would say he wanted me and he loved me... but he
didnt. Its been a few months now, i miss him... so much. I
always hear others saying his name, i still have dreams of
him. Sometimes i just hold the phone so close to my heart
and hope that he would call and tell me that he loves me
and misses me. I do love him, I do miss him..I do want him.

I talked to him a few days ago,it seemed like he still
loved me. However, when i told him i loved him..he didnt
answer.It was as if i didnt say a word. He asked me that
day if i would be going to the gathered that would be held
the next day, I told him yes maybe. I didnt ask him if he
was going. But I had a strong feeling that he would go.
Anyway i was so excited to see him that night, i waited for
him to show up. Hours went by and he show up. I wanted to
call him and ask him where he was. But i knew that i
couldnt do that, im not in the position to do such a thing.

Tonight I waited for a phone call from him...
... he didnt call.




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