JW-Writing

JW-Writing
2002-11-19 17:05:11 (UTC)

Day 1 -- the grand experiment 11/19;02

I'm hoping to avoid having to take medication for clinical
depression -- because I think pills don't solve problems.
But the fact is, I've been so depressed recently. I feel
like I'm in a cloud and fightingm y way out of the fog. I
can't breathe. I cry all the time. I can't do anything
but eat -- even though I'm NOT hungry. And I constantly
tell Drew that he can do better than me. So I tought back
to the happiest time of my life -- what was different? I
was training for a tri-athalon. I had a purpose, friends,
something to look forward to. And I was exercising.

So I"m going to exercise for a month -- start training for
the marathon my family is all running. If, after a month,
I'm back to my old self, then I'll know that I need the
physical activity to keep myself out of depression. If
not, I'll go get help.

So today I walked 1.78 miles on the treadmill -- it was 30
minutes at 3.5 miles an hour on the hill setting so the
incline kept increasing. I also did the rowing machine to
get the tightness out of my shoulders. I took a multi-
vitamin and two "C" vitamins. I feel pretty good right
now -- a little upset stomach. I'm off to go get my hair
cut and to turn some pictures in for development.




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