Relives Headtension
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2002-11-19 01:47:55 (UTC)

Hi? I am

High school was one big adventure.. i was trying new
things.. meeting new people... When you look back on those
things only a few people and experiances stand out.. I
remember when i meet my first love.. i didn't love him yet
nor did i have any attraction.. love is one of those things
that didn't intrest me at the time.. i just wanted to be
cool.. i know that sounds bad.. but isn't that what
everyone wants... well anyways i was sitting on a stoop on
front our school.. looking at the ground... when in my line
of vision i see his shoes and written on the top is "hi?"..
i kept looking and then i said why does your shoe say hi?
he said because look its like a question... hi?... and then
on my other shoe its I am.. get it... i just ohhh yeah and
walked off... he became one of my best friends in
highschool.. we had the same friends and we went to the
same oartys and he had a TON of girlfriends.. i thought he
was a player and i stayed away because i knew i caould fall
for him hard and he would leave me.... He had a certain
girlfriend that didn't like me and after that i relised..
hey i didn't do shit to this girl and shes being a bitch..
she thinks i'm gonna take her man.. well now i am.. and
then began the fight over him... in the end.. they broke
up... on my 17th birthday he gave me the best birthday i
had ever experianced.. there was band and a bunch of my
friends.. This was the first time in my life i felt like i was
beautiful.. i don't know if it was beacuse it was my birthday or if i
had grown up a little but every guy at that party hit on me.. i even
had a guy ask me what was up with me and his brother... when i said
nothing.. he said well then whats up with you and me.... finally
everyone passed out and it was me and my buddy all alone together..
they had gone shroom hunting early in the evening and apartenly the
shrooms had crumbled in a bag of weed... while he was trying to show
me i slyly put my hand on his sholder.. he looked down and looked
back at me... and said... lets go to the other room... we badass
sex.. i mean that is still on my list of memorable sex. soon after i
moved and i didn;t see much of him.. i traveled a little bit.. but
thought of him non stop.. soon i came back to town and he was the
first perosn i thought of... i found him it was great ...

what happen was i was at my sisters house in a differnt town.. ( i
wanted to se her before i went back home) i stayed up for days
partying and having a good time.. i drove an hour untill i got to his
apartment... as soon as i knocked on the door he said come in.. there
he was sleeping in his bed.. all he said was Hi babe.. as he help the
blanket open for me to crawl into.... i feel right alseep.. a very
good sleep in fact... and that was the begining of our reletionship (
which did not last long) i always knew i would not get to keep
forever.. but i was gonna hold on to him for as long as i could. he
soon got antsy and moved to washington... he asked me to wait an
did.. for a while.. i knew he wouldn't come back for me..

he did come back..but with a commitment to a girlfriend.. ( luckly he
left her there ) i waited all we needed to do was end this
reletionship... so we had sex... ( kinda blah if ya ask me) it just
felt good to finally have sex.. he started crying after words.. and
there i relised i was over him.. ( belive me ladies when your man
crys like a baby in your arms.. you get over him real quick) i never
saw him again.. i tried calling him again so that i could reconnect
with my roots.. but he tried to say i obessed with him so i dropped
rying to be his friend real fast..i would love to be his friend again
and to show him everything i have done.. but things for some reason
can't be that simple...Leason in life... sometimes you gotta let go
to grow.. and i would of never done that with him around.