Adam Wheeler

the book of rage
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2002-11-08 08:19:42 (UTC)

Rage against the dieing

Dear Mom
If all teh world is a stage, and we are all but
actors....then the world has lost one of it's best actors.
Ibby died Wed afternoon he had been fighting AIDS for
almost 5 years. He was an insperationi to me....I want to
have that much of a want to live.....I keep on playing
flood by jarsof clay it reminds me of him....Mom he had
the best out look on life, why do things like that happen
to such great people....Why is there so much that happens
in my life, why is it that everyone and everythign I care
about dies, leaves or just hurts me. I don't know I tried
talking to Nate about it.... but it looks like he can;t be
botherd with it, or me for that matter I just feel that he
doesn;t want to date me any more or that he doesn't
care.....I know it's wrong of me to want him to show it,
but one part of me does. No it's not even that.... I
liked him b4 he had money now everytime I talk to him he's
like I bought this and I get that and this that and the
other thing...I'm happy that he has money, but It's
driving me up the wall......
hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh he fucken drives me up
the wall.........I just called his house and terry answers
the phone "yaeh he's in bed" what the hell....I'm not
impressed....grrrrr what the fuck... I don;t think I would
ever do that to him him find some reason
not to spend time with me on sat.... what the fuck I'm
sooo mad. but what ever this isn't a rant about nate
letter this is a Ibby letter.......any wyas I'm gong to go
to write an e-mail to nate now
love you and miss you