Adam Wheeler

the book of rage
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2002-11-06 03:37:08 (UTC)


Dear Mom
I need sleep.... but every time I close my eyes I dream
again.. I talked to nate last night....he said that it
wasn't my fault that I didn;t do anything wrong but I konw
I did I konw that if I haddn't been the cold hearted bitch
that I was then he would be alive.....I wouldn't have to
put up with this aand life would be good and J and I would
still be friends.....why do I have to do things like that
why were our last words in anger. Why could I just return
his e-mail take his phone calls....why did he have to do
what he did I don't konw if he didn't think I wouldn't
find out if it wouldn't hurt me or what but i was hurt by
it and it did make me mad and angery and wanting to hurt
him and hurt him bad... how could he date that could he even look at him after what he had
done to JJ after JJ's deat... oh Mom I killed him no
matter what anyone said I did it I should have just shot
him my self in person would hurt less....I miss him I miss
JJ too... I have to go Love you and Miss you

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