The Life of the young and broke!
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2001-08-10 22:51:04 (UTC)

The Beginning!

Well..... As I have said many times in the past I am going
to start writing in a journal so that I stop spreading what
people tell me to my friends. This way I can just put it in
her and no one knows. WELL..... No one that I know at least
b/c I know most of my friends would never even think about
logging on to a stie like this! Yea, I might tell a few of
them the address so they can look it up but they would have
to relize that what I write in here is not meant to hurt
them its just all the crap I'm not ready to tell them
staraight up yet. I mean honestly u can't get mad at
someone for what they write in their dairy thats there
business. If u read it and get mad b/c they talked about u
well it was your fault to begin with if u couldn't handle
it don't read it!!!!! Anyways.... onto my life. Care is
moving in a few weeks and it still hasn't sunk it that one
of my best friends will be thousands of miles away and in a
totally different country probably speaking a totally
different language. I'm really not sure if I am ready to
handle her leaving but I guess I will have to get ready now
won't I?¿? She has always been the friend of mine that
worried to much and that was to serious never wanted to
take chances but I needed that I mean I'm 2 wild I believe
I would take any chance. She does push me to take a lot of
chances though like the whole deal with the love of my life
spencer. I want him so bad but all he wants (and I think
all he cares about) is play. He wants me to give head and
he wants to fuck me well its not going to happen. He tells
me he loves me and that he wants to go out with me but he
can't b/c 2 many of his friends like me well I'm sorry to
burst his bubble but I have told any goes that I know like
me that I like spencer and no one else. In my mind Spencer
is just being a horny ass bastard and he usually isnt like
that. It just bugs me that he is acting like that I want
the old spencer back I thought I had made a point to say
that but obviously not or maybe when I do say it it doesnt
get past all the freakin hormones in his freakin head. oh
well though I guess a teenage guy is going to be a teenage
guy! I need to be a lil more responsible though!! I missed
my fall sports pics today b/c I forgot (although I don't
think I could have made it anyways b/c I tore my acl and I
was in a butt load of pain this morning) All muy squadmates
say I'm taking it way to hard but I dunno. but thats all I
really got to say rite now I need to give Kristen a call
because her birthday is tomm and she is freakin takin a
hell of awhile to give me a time for us to get together I
mean honestly do I need to call her house and make a freak
appointment or what!?!?!?! Oh well.......

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