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2002-11-02 05:46:13 (UTC)

God, Ghosts, Pep Assemblies

Pep assemblies are the works of satan, lucifer, hitler,
bjiente, what-have-you. The stress involved in abducting a
beautiful girl from school so she can escape this torment
is enourmous. Its ok though. Everything is worth something.
And many things are worth more than others. The
subjectivity of this statement may be vague but you'll
catch on.

Where is god? I want to know. Because im sick of answering
all his damn questions. The most repulsive thing i can
think of is people denying religion and/or "god" for some
relationship or another trivial idiosyncrasy. Although not
religious at all, and as athiest as they come, i still
believe that people should stick to their beliefs, even if
life is dire. People tell me things like, "Oh you're an
athiest? Me too, because my girlfriend dumped me. Why are
you one?" At this point i leave for fear of a sharp
connection between my hand and their face, resulting....in
some hurt feelings. Don't get me wrong. When i say, "I'm
sick of answering his damn questions" im really being a
fucking huge hypocrite. Because, mostly, god's answers are
common sense. I don't have enough common sense to solve my
own problems as quickly as i could. But thats the point
boys and girls, god = common sense. I realized that, well,
among other things as well, but a big part is common sense.
As i was talking to a friend today, a distrurbing comment
was uttered from his lips. i said,

ME: "Don't you think god gets a little tired of people
pissing and moaning all the time about how thankful they
are and how not-worthy they are, and how much shit they
want, and how they want to fuck that girl down the street,
and how they want to win the lottery , and 'oh god? if you
give me a million dollars and some down-the-street-pussy, i
go to church! does that work?'"

JON: "Yeah, i think he does."

ME: "Then why keep doing it?"

JON: "Because thats what he wants."

ME: "How do you know what god wants? HE NEVER ASKS YOU FOR
SHIT. Thats where most religions go wrong. Maybe god is
just chilling up in heaven all lonely because hes got no
one to talk to. No one to ask how his day went, or how much
he bet on that damn Bears game, or how many people he
saved. I'd get pretty damn lonely if i were god. I'm sorry
jon, but thats where catholocism goes wrong, god doesnt
want to be some undisputable tyrant who rules with an iron
fist, i think god just wants a friend. I feel sorry for the

Now, i have a difficult time categorizing my beliefs. As
you can see. Maybe i'm an athiest. Maybe i'm a nihilist.
Maybe i'm an existentialist. Maybe i believe in god, but i
hate him. Or maybe, i believe in god, but i'm just not a
big fan of the guy, i mean, hes not really doing what id
call a "tip-top" job with running the universe and shit.

And, another thing thats bugging me. If god's there, what
about ghosts and shit? I am seriously not fucking lying
when im talking about my bed and shit. And the closet! How
the FUCK do you esssplain my closet?? Oh well, life is
birth, fear, acceptance, fear, knowledge, fear, fear of
death, acceptance, and death. In that order. I'm not to
worried, if they wanted to hurt me, im sure they would have
by now. Been almost.......5 years? something like that.
Thats me for now. I love all of you. Dont forget that.

Remember, take care of others, and take care of yourselves.



PS: If you have no fucking idea what i'm talking about when i
say 'they' or i mention beds or closets, email me. I'll fill you in.
Or i'll write an entry about it. Peace.

PPS: To those who are part of my devoted fanbase, when i say peace,
as i do in every entry, i dont say it like "Peace motherfuckers!"
or "peace out bitch!" Envision Gandhi saying it. Thats how i say it.
Like i mean it. Like i know what the fucking word means. Ha. Thank
you. return to your buisness.