Unholy and Dirty and Beautiful Me
...and that equals seven...
As of two weekends ago I've slept with seven guys. Am I a
slut? Maybe just easy. What the hell is the difference. I
feel like I might be stupid, where has this gotten me??
Don't get me wrong...it's not like I go out every weekend
and get laid..I'm 20 and I first had sex when I was 14 so
that's seven guys in six years..still, them numbers are
a'creeping and I still have no love.
Ya, I slept with MaD on our camping trip. Not totally
bad 'cause I do like him and stuff, I just feel kinda bad
about it because a) I hadn't spoken to him since until
tonight and it's been almost 2 weeks, b) he's friends with
CoG and c) We're supposed to go camping again this weekend.
The whole thing is really complicated, it's hard to go
into details about how mixed up I feel about it right now
and I'm sure you don't care to hear it all.
Tonight I FINALLY called him ( I was outta town for the
past week and a half) but left a message. Hope he'll return
my call tomorrow.
I don't know what I want from him, but I'd like things to
go a little like that again I think. I'd like to see more
Tonight was just weird because after I called him, ApK
called and asked me to come out to see him with her 'cause
she had to drop something off for him so I went along and
CoG happened to be there and that was just WAYYYY too weird.
So I'll prolly go camping this weekend and who knows when
I'll be here again.
ToF keeps calling and I haven't the guts to tell him I don't wanna
see him anymore/don't have time/whatever, so I've been ignoring his
"..do them boys like they used to do you..."