camicazy

Meshed Up
Ad 2:
2002-10-23 11:40:50 (UTC)

beyotch gab

gah. frozen fingers. sigh. but anyway, i shall indulge
myself in my thoughts to keep my mind from thinking of my
fingers...all frozen to death.

first of all, there are times when i am not verbal about
what i think or what i feel because i do not want to cause
trouble. sometimes though, i wish everybody would think
back to what they have done and ponder over whether they're
guilty of the same crime or not before jumping at the
chance to tell people off. it's annoying. really.

secondly, i can't imagine marrying someone who disses the
things that i care about. god i hope my future husband
would not hold me back from the things that i wanna get
involved in...or from the things that truly matter to me.
if he does, i'll give him a divorce. or i would rather not
marry at all.

i have also realized that i don't like doing something if
people expect me to do that thing. i would rather do things
for people who don't ask me to do anything for them. the
fact that i am obligated to someone really turns me off. i
don't want to feel obligated to comfort a person, or to
call a person, or to be at a certain place at a certain
time. i would rather do things out of the goodness of my
heart than to feel obligated to.

and i hate people who act cute. or people who do something
just for attention. ick. they're so disgusting and
pathetic. wish they'd all just go to a corner and look at a
mirror and act cute by themselves.

sigh. i suppose i'm in an annoyed mood right now. a good
friend of mine is pissed off as well. must've rubbed off on
me...or maybe it's because of the conversation we had. the
conversation wasn't annoying, it was just able to surface
up a lot of my pet peeves.

---

on a lighter note, i was able to find 'teenage angel' by
addict. yay. it's such a beautiful song.

was walking to uni this morning with two other people.
talked about the bomb scare yesterday...and i said, 'i
wonder what would happen if a bomb explodes right here
right now.'

friend 1 said, 'errr...candice...'

friend 2 said, 'you would go to heaven and i would go to
hell.'

well all i'm saying is, i wouldn't mind being around when a
bomb explodes. sort of like my pal tina.

and yes even though i would like to be someone noble, i
would rather die an unimportant painless death than die an
important painful death. pain sucks. of course if i had it
my way, i would rather die an important and painless death.
sort of like getting shot in the head by a government
official because of the corruption i've exposed..or because
of the movement i've caused.

that might sound unimportant and useless to some people,
but for me, that would be one of the best ways to die. i
would love to die for a cause. die for the cause. pick up
someone's sword and fight till the end.

current mood : blah
current music: crying - joe satriani


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