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the amazing adventures of me and me
2002-10-21 15:19:56 (UTC)

Screwed In the City, Part III

Hello again. After a lovely weekend I am once again
ready to profile another friend in what I have
named, "screwed in the city". After the votes were
tallied (all 5 of them :), results are in and -----
drumroll please-------- JESS will be the center of today's
entry.


Now, before I get into this i'd just like to reiterate--I
do NOT make up this stuff!! These are my ACTUAL friends
who live in new york. And no matter the tone I use to
describe these women, I really would like to emphasize that
these are my closest friends in the world and I have
nothing but the utmost respect and love for them.

okay....without further ado

JESS

to know and understand Jess you have to understand two
things. First, she has had a less-than-ideal
upbringing. Her biological father was an abusive
alcoholic who owned a bar. The first 5 years of her life
was spent living in/above that bar with her mother in a
tiny apartment. After finally leaving this man, Jess's
mother dove headfirst into abusive relationship #2, and #3,
and #4....... Jess found an older guy to cling to when
she was young, losing her virginity at 13 and remaining his
girlfriend until she left for college. Although this
relationship was not physically abusive, it was
emotionally, peaking when he forced Jess to have an
abortion.
The second thing you need to know about Jess is that she
has incredibly large breasts. She is one of those genetic
freaks of nature who was born 5'5", 110 lbs, and somehow
has DD breasts. Its really ridiculous but important to
know.

I met Jess freshman year in college. Of course, my first
impression was "my god look at those things!" But after
we pledged the same sorority (and shared our utter distaste
for every sister in the house) we became good friends. I
realized that she was incredibly intelligent, and
ridiculously fun to party with. On that same note, I
couldnt help but notice the attention she got from men. It
was phenomenal. She could get anything she wanted from
any guy she wanted it from. Of course, the downside was
that most men assumed big breasts meant big sex drive and
small brain.

Jess and I, along with the rest of the 'crew', are known
for our love for and ability to party. (There was a
period senior year, for example, when we went 3 months
without a sober night.) Taking this into consideration,
Jess often found herself in tricky situations with men.
That with Jess's appearance and her somewhat promiscuous
past was a volatile combination. Sophomore year she passed
out in a fraternity, only to wake up in the middle of the
night to a brother having sex with her. Many more times
she would wake up in a strange bed, not completely sure
what had happened. She interned with a pro-football team
on summer and had sex with 2 of the players (both of whom
were married.) She cheated on every boyfriend she ever
had. She frequently found herself at the school clinic,
choking down another morning-after pill. I could go on....

Of course, all of us tried and tried to get Jess to calm
down. we were worried about her feelings, her health, and
her reputation. Unfortunately, the day we started
confronting her about these things was simply the day she
stopped telling us about them.

Senior year came, and it was formal time. Jess decided
to take a blind date. Paul. After spending the night and
rest of the weekend with this guy, Jess was in love. He
was the male-slut of our campus and she was his female
counterpart. It was a match made in heaven....

Graduation came and went and somehow Paul and Jess had
stayed together through it all. Of course, Jess cheated
on Paul perpetually and he did the same to her, but besides
that their relationship was really quite stable. They
both moved to a new jersey city just outside of NY, and
began their careers. Paul was an accountant at a very
respectable NY firm. This was very stressful for him, and
he began to drink and blow coke much more often than he
ever had. Jess was a buyer for a major department store,
and she began to extend happy hour every night so that she
would not have to come home to Paul. He had always shown
some tendencies for substance abuse, (he was always the
most drunk at the bar, the guy who did the most drugs, the
guy who was deemed "crazy' in college....) but never to
this extent. He was downright angry now. Jess didn’t
feel comfortable going out with him in public anymore. she
knew he would get drunk and angry and start fights with her
or strangers. He had been kicked out of numerous bars and
had been arrested for drunk driving and for assault when he
hit a bartender.

Paul was spiraling downward. And he was taking Jess with
him. As her friends we wanted to help, but every time we'd
try and tell her to leave him, she'd make excuses for him
and then remind us that he does do this and that for her.
Jess's reasoning was ridiculous; she deserved to have a
bottle thrown at her head, to walk into the door on her
birthday to find Paul passed out in front of a table full
of lines and empty bottles, to be degraded in public, to be
told what to do..... she deserved this because somehow she
made him act this way, and she 'owed' him because he paid
for her car, her apartment, her furniture....

It got to the point where the rest of us refused to see
him. He was not allowed anywhere near us and if Jess
brought him along, we would leave. We confronted her over
and over again, trying every method possible to convince
her to leave him.

Jess pulled away from us. We really only saw her about
once a month for the 1-2 years after that.... she had
chosen Paul over us. And from what she told us, things
were on the upswing. Paul stopped doing coke, Paul and her
decided to be 100% faithful, Paul and her were spending the
summer at cape cod.....

Thats when the shit hit the fan...

The day before Paul and Jess were to leave on their month-
long "our love is wonderful" vacation, Jess decided to
stop by early and wake him up for breakfast. She walked
into his bedroom only to find him, and another girl, having
sex.

I hadnt spoken to Jess in a couple months but when she
called me crying I went straight to her apartment. She was
a mess. her dreams of finally starting a normal
relationship had been shattered.

We helped Jess through this for the next year or so. We
forbid her from speaking to him, we found her a new
apartment in the city, we basically babysat her until she
was ready to be alone. I will never forget, one night she
was so upset, not because she had left Paul, but because
she had at one time chosen him over us. Now she knew
better...

Of course, this isn't a fairy tale. Jess did not make a
complete transformation. She has gone back to Paul on a
few occasions, she has made mistakes with other men as
well. New york city is filled with plenty of men and
trouble for Jesse to get herself into. But she has been
much more selective and has demanded much more respect.
Right now, for example, she has a boy-toy from the
Philippines who could make your teeth sweat.
But anyway-- I am proud to say that she has been single,
self-sufficient, and happier than ive ever seen her for the
past 2 years. Yeah us. :)





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