Every single time i see brian, i cant help myself. i kiss
him so much, its amazing. same thing for him with me. i
think we are doin things more than we talk.
its sad, but i dont mind it. i wish there was more, but i
know that we will reach that point to where its like..lets
just talk now akay babe. or what not.
tomaro he comes over like right when i get home from school
cus i told him i felt uncomfortable with him pickin me up
from school. hes gonna stay here for like an hour and when
my mom comes, im gonna ask her if he can come over and then
he'll come over again. its his day off and after
monday, i wont see him again for like a week. soo sad.
im scared that when he comes over we'll.......make love? maybe
im all taking this too far but this boy is so horny and it
sometimes makes me wonder if thats the only reason, or
moslty the reason why hes with me. is to get some. since
his 2 year relsonship with this X finace! didnt work out,
which i always think 'how the fuck am i gonna top that???'
ohhh. so much shit on my mind.
im scared to lose 'it', but i want to as well. ugh. i just
dont want to deal with birth control! and pap smears! (sp?)
or him wanting to do me every second! or me faking
orgasams. nooooo. owell, it should be nice to see him
anyways. xoxo byeyas. goodnight