molly the undead

you THINK you know...and you probably do
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2002-10-17 02:20:25 (UTC)

Wednesday, 10/16/02

I hate child beauty pageants. I watched one once on
television. A bunch of five year old girls with big ugly
hair and big ugly teeth. Most of their eyes were too big.
Actually, I hate all children. Disgusting, filthy
brats...always picking their noses and wiping it on you.
Horrible disease spreading parasites.

I hate those little plastic things that some people stick
on the end of their pens and pencils. They really piss me
off. What is the purpose? Then I just can't help but stare
at it and continue to be amazed at what kind of idiot would
actually spend money on something so incredulously
pointless. An obvious invention of the white man.

I hate these new toothbrushes that keep coming with super-
grip handles, flexible heads and nuclear powered bristles.
Extra-grip handles? Because people have problems with their
toothbrushes flying out of their hands when they brush too
erratically? Flexible head brushes are for wankers. If you
can't reach a particular spot in your mouth then just jam
the brush in there. Smash it around a bit, take the pain.

I hate people who think that new born babies are cute. They
look like shrivled prunes, just admit it. Screw the parents
feelings. They're so happy because they've just had a baby
that they won't care what you say. This is also a good time
to borrow money.

I also hate the following items on this list:

-Red pens
-The NRA
-That not-so-fresh feeling
-Sticky children
-Green soft drinks
-Line dancing
-Fishing shows
-Drunk middle-aged men
-Watches with more than two buttons
-When people say "arthur" instead of "author"
-Having hair in my mouth
-Getting hit by bird crap
-People who have gun racks in their truck
-Low water fountains with low water pressure
-When they play Xmas songs at the mall in December
-Pringles ads (EATING IS NOT A TOTAL BODY EXPERIENCE)
-Band-Aids with disgustingly cute cartoon characters on
them
-Price stickers that don't peel off in one piece
-Mormons who breed excessively
-National anthems
-Erasable ink pens
-The Whopper Jr
-That damn leprechaun off of the Lucky Charms
-The way people eat something, say it's disgusting, then
shove it in your face demanding that you taste it also


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