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2002-10-13 22:05:03 (UTC)

dont ask questions you dont want the answer to

i hate them sometimes.
i hate when they argue.
when they hit things.
when theyre screaming so loud i cant even attempt to do my
i hate them.
i hate this.
i hate being here.
i want to run away
and everything is so fucked up
i dont know what to do
i am at a loss
and im the stable one
i always have tried so hard to be
and its just all fucked up
theyre so drunk
i couldnt even do my homework
the power kept going out
i just wanted to make my fucking brownies
i just wanted to be cute
i wanted to be happy
and the power kept going out
and my dad didnt like my pumpkin
and my mom tried to make me food
she heated me up cheese
and sometimes i cant pretend that im not upset
and i got really mad
and i just wanted to be alone
so i ran away with my soup
and then my turtle made me sneeze
and i had to leave
and then my dad got the computer to work
but she keeps talking to me
whats wrong
whats wrong
whats wrong with you
what happened
talk to me
im here to listen
right now "is there anything i can do?"
yes. actually.
there fucking is.
but you wont.
you cant.
muff this
muff that
our convo thus far right now :
"muff, i know youre upset. talk to me."
"yeah. i am. but youre not going to change anything to
make it better. so why talk about. i dont want to fucking

and it seems like

my life is one fucking rerun after another.