lilbrit

Day to Day
2001-08-01 19:12:29 (UTC)

He's Gone

I guess as of now, me and jeff are no longer nething. I
guess not even friends. Last night I called him, u know for
a simple what's up, but all I got on the other end was
hostility and anger. He was so cold and short with
everything he said. It's really beginning to hurt now, that
was my best friend, or so I thought. Whatever, fuck it, I
mean why am I so stupid to have even thought he cared as
much as I did. I was also stupid to have thought he wanted
nething more than friendship from me because I mind as well
realize, I'm not the kinda girl who can write a fucking
book about my sexual life. But honestly I thought he would
understand because he knew what I went through 2 years ago
and then with Brandon. OH WELL! It sux because no matter
how much I tell my self that it doesn't matter, it won't
sink in, I still care. I don't know what I did and he won't
tell me so I am in another hopeless situation. I would say
he is just a guy and he doesn't matter but I trusted Jeff
and I really thought he cared. I'm crying so hard, I hate
crying over guys, THEY ARE NOT WORTH IT!!!!
I should be happy, I mean there are 2 guys who like me
right now, and I'm gonna talk to them but they aren't Jeff.
This is probably all because of another girl, I hate that!
Why can't I be the crazy, beautiful girl who gets the guy.
Fuck him and fuck the rest of the world. I'm gonna go home
and get ripped off my ass and try to get some pain killers.
I know that is not the best route but damn it works when
your trying to get shit off your mind. Fuck life and the
rest of the world.