Crazy Girl

Diving Under
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2002-10-08 05:35:10 (UTC)

Life is really funny. When you..

Life is really funny. When you think you know what will
happen you really dont or when you are in a good spot just
one day turns. The other day... I woke up really refreshed,
ready to go. Went to the school early, auditioned for a
play. I was confident. Well I go to class, and everything
starts to go wrong. I feel like shit, no sleep for a long
time. Dont make the play. Lose a friend. Get in fight with
boyfriend make up with boyfriend. Go to dinner with
boyfriend and get the worst call of my life during it. All
my friends say shit about me, just wanna kick "Someones"
ass and I calm down but then decide to die slowly and start
smoking for the rest of my life. Hell I am gonna die
sometime, might as well live it up right?!

Well my perspective on things are a bit different then that
night. I know I might die someday... but that is not why i
am smoking. Yes I started smoking again, and now my man
does it to. He seems to want to now and not just because of
me. That is kewl because I dont want it to be just me. He
is a wacky smoker... he looks weird, but I guess it is
because I am not used to it.. and maybe he isnt either. I
really hope he doesnt resent me for it later. I found that
most of my friends didnt say have the crap I heard... or at
least thats what they say. I mean that is like a shitload
to one. I mean I dont know who to believe but with the way
my one friend is acting, I dont really know anymore. I mean
why would they say that about me... nothing I MEAN nothing
happened. Besides, I love my man! MY MAN! He is just,
mmmm!!! *drools* oh sorry bout that! I really just miss my
friend who to me acts like she doesnt care at all about
whats going on. She acts like she is the only one who ever
gets bitched on. I am the only bitch around here it seems.
Which is fine with me I guess, since it is a one sided
thing. Must all be my fault. Everything else it. I am just
to stupid to understand. Go ahead and say it cuz I hate it
when you say I dont understand, it is your "nice" way of
saying I am stupid. And It is just fucked up the way you
say it. I really cant say anything else to you lady (you
know who I am talking about) but you just dont care. Or
want to listen or seem to want to hear anything else.
Weird! But whatever, like you say all the time. I just made
your like a living hell, there was nothing good right? that
is how you act. But whatever... it is YOUR dicision and
your alone, you dont seem to care what I think. I really do
care and dont want to stop being friends, but that doesnt
matter at all, does it.

And to my man and his "best friend"! You two knock it off,
get over it and stop! You are weird! WEIRD! You hear me
baby! you two are just weird. lolololol! ok.. later


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