2001-08-01 03:11:22 (UTC)

Thoughtful thoughts......

I have had a good day so far today. I have been to a job
interview and got past the first stage which I am happy
about. It's a retail traineeship in the city. I would be
more than pleased to get that job. I need a stable job and
this could be it. I had to loge a form at centrelink today.
That always makes me feel bad. Today it wasn't a long wait
in line. I must've looked so out of place. There are all
these people in Traccy daks and sweatshirts in there and I
was wearing a suit. I know what it is like to be totally
unemployed. I've been there. And I used to wear Traccy daks
there too. That was not so long ago. I guess wearing a suit
makes me feel important, and I am important. Everyone is
important, even that drunk that lies in the gutter singing
tunes from long ago is important. Anyway the point is, I
don't want to lodge form anymore. For awhile I didn't have
to because I was working 6 hours a day, 7 days a week. Not
good for my social life, but extremely good for my
financial situation. Anyway I am not going to bitch about
that anymore. What's done is done. My boss finally has my
unstable work falling on his head. He needed me today. I
was going to an interview and that was that. It hits hard
when he relises that I am not going to be there always for
him. If he hasn't cut my hours he would've had someone to
open up for him this morning. Anyway enough said about
I do appreicate the fact that my boss gave me a chance. It
is not all bad. Kings Cross Sydney Australia is a great
place to work because you see everything. In the end you
become desensitized to the bad things that happen around
you. But it is so ALIVE and that what I love about it.
I saw stuart yesterday. He came past my work to chat to
me. I still havent spoken to him about how I really feel
inside. But maybe i won't. He still winks and carries on
with me. But I am not as upset as I was. I guess I am
getting into a mindset where at first things upset me and
they upset me greatly, but when I calm down it doesn't seem
so bad anymore. Even if Stuart does leave, I have got him
as a friend and possibly when I go to England in the future
(I am planning to go at the end of next year or the year
after) I can meet up with him there. Goodbye may not be
Stuart reminds me of Hugh Grant. I have a big crush on
Hugh Grant at the moment. I think he is a wonderful actor.
I saw bridget Joneses Diary and he is brilliant. I loved
the film and I am going to go and see it again. But anyway.
Thats all thats on my mind today.
I havent organised the cattery. I am lazy sometimes. Lazy
is good.
Thats all for today....
" Today is the beginning of the rest of your life"

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