camicazy

Meshed Up
2002-10-02 13:40:01 (UTC)

people

i just hate it when people exaggerate their own existence
in this world. they think they're above everybody else,
they think they're so important, that they're known, yet
they think they're so humble and good and kind.

yeah. some people are humble and damn proud of it.

so i'm back in melbourne, flew for 12 hours or something
like that. was it shitty. cramped and shitty.

one girl sat beside me and kept squirming around and
putting her legs up on the chair. then her foot would
constantly poke me in the thigh, and she'd laugh for no
reason at all. weird thing was, i was watching a movie. and
everytime somebody got killed or hurt, she would laugh out
loud.

and i noticed that there are some people who only talk to
you when they talk about themselves. when you start talking
about other things, they lose interest. but when you ask
them about themselves again, they're off talking like
there's no tomorrow. how sad.

read a political novel again entitled dekada '70. shed
tears several times while reading. sometimes i wonder what
i would have done if i lived during those times when
martial law was declared. would i have become an activist
and risked my life for the cause? would i have been a
writer who travelled and investigated many cases of human
rights violations? would i have been the person who didn't
give a damn and ended up in the trash with 17 stab wounds?
or would i have just been the person who lay low and just
let everything flow?

would i have been a different person if i grew up during
those times? would i have been braver? or more cowardly?

got goosebumps when i finished reading the book. the unity
of the people to fight and make war for a cause they
willingly dedicated their lives to sent my heart racing. memories of
the rally came to mind, although i know the rally i experienced is
nothing compared to those times.

a man is not a man unless he has something worth dying for.





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