No longer out of touch
2001-07-30 04:16:36 (UTC)

Waiting on the right one.

Today was a day that I thank God for.As far as partying goes I have definitely had my share!I dont think any drug or person could had given me the peace at heart and continous joy I experienced.Today there wasnt A person,place,or thing that could have spoiled my gratitude towards life today.I know that everything that happens in life happens for a reason.I dont think there is any such thing as coincidences.Everything is put in place just as it should be.To be able to look at people as being people.I guess sometmes we spend so much time worried,selfish,self giving,and stuck soooo far up our own asses we become blind to the beauty and love around us.We stay in battles with ourselves wondering why this and why that we dont take the oppurtunity to let all of the self manifested bullshit goooo!Like for instance I use too all ways stay in anger from the yesterday and constant fear of tomorrow.Always feeling like theres something missing,I need to do or say more,I wish this whole world could just stop for one fucking hour and maybe you can see what the hell your doing to me.Can you not see the pain Im in.The troubles you are causing,and why,why,why,why,why,why,why,doesnt it seem to get any better than this.It cant get better until I stop and listen to waht the hell is going on in me and learn to try and fix it and just take time to say fuck whats going on around me.I can start to live as nature intended and care for those around me and not worry about whats going on a year from now.I cant constantly wonder what other people are thinking about me or somebody else besides it shouldnt be my place to know what other people think!when I take a real good look at me and try and make right all that other screwed up shit,all that worry and fear,wasted time and nonproductive fantasies seem to disappear or dont get to my head as much.Life today is good if I just slow down and take a look at the whole picture. Everything I need is within an arms reach today.My home,car,music,money,games,friends,family,and girlfriends are all gifts to me.Gifts that should never be taken for granted.And I really did see alot of beautiful woman today.Left and right.And for the first time in my life it was okay to be single. To feel the wide choices in life and all of us being one of the same,human.The peace I had for where I stood at that moment in my very small spot in life.People have said before they are but a speck in this universe.I shouldnt have to take myself so damn seriously at times.Try to grow and love myself and others today,what I want in life will surely follow.We dont have to let what goes on around us change and mold us into to what we percieve is to be done to us or how we should act.The real changes are to be made when we look into ourselves and what we find go with it and fix what is broken.I had a very good day and for that I am thankful.Everyday may not be as good but im alive and I can change it anytime.Only I can be happy with me.Good Night World.