redstarfish2

No Matter How Hard I Try...
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2002-09-30 22:20:11 (UTC)

suck fest

Emotions suck. Well, I'd complain if I didn't have them,
but they still suck. I'm really upset, but I don't really
understand why. I mean yeah, I know part of it, but I don't
get it. I cleaned my whole room out again. I re organized
my room and closet and everything else over the past week
so there really isn't much to do. And my room was spotless
to begin with, I can't stand it being messy. I can't sleep
in my room if it's messy. It's weird...but I also clean and
cook when I'm upset or mad or whatever. *sigh* I wish I
could figure myself out. Everyone else always knows
something is wrong...my emotions show in my eyes. If I'm
happy they are a really pretty green with blue centers.
When I'm pissed they are a really dark brown, when I'm
seriously mad, they are an amber/red color, when I'm really
really upset, they are a faded green/light blue color.
Weird...I know. It makes no sence. When I'm in pain, they
are glazed over, when I'm happy they are sparkly I guess
you could call it that, when I'm sad they look dry and
empty. But I like my eyes. *looks around* *sigh* I think
that's all...just wanted to vent a little.
***
"nothing is ever what it seems"
***
"If I could come back in life as anything, I would want to
be one of your tears. What more could I want then to be
concieved in your heart, born in your eyes, live on your
cheeks, and die on your lips?"


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