OhBaby It Is Me

MY SO-CALLED LIFE
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2002-09-29 04:58:52 (UTC)

Doubts

Another day another problem. Actually I lied, there are
no problems here. I have a boyfriend that is AWESOME and
couldn't love me more, oh wait that is the problem. I
don't know if it's for real. I don't know if I'm just
getting played like you would never believe or if he really
honestly likes me. If he doesn't then he's putting up a
good show. All his friends and such are all nice, and I'm
just kinda scared that he's totally playing me for a fool.
I feel like such an ass for thinking so, but better to feel
like a fool now then look like one if it proves to be
true. I think that I should be talking to him about this
and not here, but it just seems too good to be true. I
know that he's gonna get pissed when I talk to him about
it, wither he'll show it or not. I can just tell by the
way he sits when he gets pissed. It's kind of scary how
much I know and can tell about him already. But I have
seen him just about everyday since I've met him. I'm such
a sucker if it proves to all be true. I feel so bad for
doubting him but I don't know how I'll feel when it turns
out to be the truth. I'm such a mess right now. I don't
want it to keep me from having fun with him like I always
do. But all of his friends like me, and his brother who's
seen me and I havn't seen him, apparently likes me b/c of
all the good stuff Matt talks about me. I don't know what
to think any more. I think that next time I see him I
should ask. If he cares so much for me like he says, he
shouldn't be that upset if I just ask. Maybe hypatheticly
or however you feel like spelling it. man!


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