elaine

elaine thoughts
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2002-09-26 22:10:07 (UTC)

september 25 thoughts

well i have bben very depresed last few days ,due to my ex
bf trial thing,his sister told me shed tell me what
happened that day and never did ,she was telling me how
her mom told her she ses her kids as aborted babies thats
what thy were to hr eventhough they were alive,she is a
disgrase for a human being ,doesnt care to write leeny tlak
to him nothing while her son is in jail she is stuck to her
self doesnt care about anyone ,i am glad she was never my
mom how dare someone say somethign so terrible as that.:(
well i have been in the downside of life wondering when it
will ever get better ,think about past then think about
what i want for future ,i go back and forth to if i should
give my ex bf another chance and wait for him if its months
hes in jail then i also say forget it he hurt me too much .
its like god teling me one thing and devil telling me
another
,talked to my kids which are the only gifts on earth whom
are keeping me strong besides god ,they aredoing well
but know thye miss me .lost kids cause i was giving there
father plenty chance to change his wayss and all and it
came to be too late and he cheated on me and hs mom
betrayed me so i am hurt bey it ,well ,daught whos 9 told
me she wants to be with me ,and that hopefully soon i get
them back which was goign to be in summer of next year,but
they want me soon er than that ,so i have to get better was
online looking for job ,nurseign job said they were nt
hiring made me sad ,then i kept loking and thinking ,and
told myself i need any job downt matter what it is so i did
have plans to look for job tomorw,well sayig prayers fr my
kidsfr my life and all ,and leeny and hoping life can get
better one day in time,saying good nigt signing off today


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