LUNA

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2002-09-24 14:02:55 (UTC)

Being burnt at the stake

Its amazing what you find out about your family when times
get tough. My grandmother is dying right now of emphazema
and lung cancer, now jaudice has set it and her organs are
shutting down. My mother wanted me to help out with taking
care of her and I had no problems with it in the begining.
It was certainly hard and I could't understand why the rest
of my family wasn't there to help my mom, and my two
sisters and I. I helped out but mind you I am a single mom
with NO BOYFREIND OR HUSBAND to help me out. I work full
time and go to school and hope somewhere in between that I
can see my daughter or spend time with her. The times I
helped out I got screwed by my mom..she promised to be
there too relieve me and was late by 2 hours everyday. I
can't do that anymore and expect to get to work on time, or
make it in school. I have told her that I cannot help out
anymore. She has in not so many words dis-owned me and my
sister has taken on the same persona..Telling me I have no
love for my family and that my priorities are fucked up. I
took control of my life and stepped up to bat and this is
how I am treated. I love my grandma more that anyone in my
family, I know if she was of sound mind she would
understand and tell me that it is ok!! That is the ONLY
thing that is helping me through this..I should have
listened to my counselors all there years and took thier
advice when they told me that I should tell my mom and
sister to beat it. I knew I should have listened...And now
I have to swallow the pill. I will not be kicked anymore. I
love you grandma, I prayed for grandma Ellingson to come to
you and let you feel comforted and let you know its gonna
be ok! I wish I could take the pain away from you..God
please relieve her suffering...


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