*Baby*

July 24th, 2001

well as we were walking in the house after a day at the
beach. im walking in the living room when the phone rings.
i pick up its antonia for my mom. i remeber talking to my
family earlier that day in d.r ( dominican republic) but
anyway they go your grandfather is sick again ( he has
cancer)but then we get the news that he just passed away. i
didnt cry right away. i was nonchalant about it. i mean
like i was sad but i was mostly scared. i didnt know how my
family was going to take it. knowing that my uncle was
going to go see him the next day and he just died. im glad
he isnt suffering anymore. but im going to miss him and i
hope i had gotten a chance to see him one last time. all i
have are memories, good ones. and funny ones. but the one
memory that i keep thinking of it when i first met him when
i was 7 and i first went over there. but anyway mom left
that same night, she took it real bad, she was so sad, but
she called me today and shes doing good, she slept last
night on his bed were he last was. befor he died. but i
mean like i hope everything turns out ok. i was crying
yesterday, i was sad. i wore my black dress, and i was just
thinking of him all day. i was at chris's house which he
did make me feel better. he gave me a white rose. in this
glass vase with a lavender ribbon on it. its beautiful.
ok yesterday the 25th i didnt do much. i was first at ana
my cousin house trying to help out her mom cuz she was all
depressed about what happened to him. we all called him
papa. but anyway after that i came to my dads house then i
left to chris house. omg his dad walked in on us he came
this close of seeing something that would of killed me!
lol. but anyway i noticed that chris has changed. in such a
good way. i mean like i noticed ever since i confronted him
on the 24th and he noticed that i really couldnt take it
anymore that he was just like shocked that i would
acctually tell him that i didnt think we should be
together, well i had to go out. so that night i didnt talk
to him cuz of papa passing. but i did call him at like 12am
and i talked to him i cried with him on the phone he made
me feel so good like nothing could of hurt me or anything.
but yea like ever since that night he has been worriying
about me like crazy. and like i coudl notice how he
changed, its so nice to have him like that. i love him. so
much. but anyway im gonna stop writing cuz im writing to
much. but oh yea we were talking on how weird everything
was, like my mom and dad know his aunt and uncle. she used
to carry me when i was a baby and she loves me so much she
is such a good person. my mom asked me if she knew that i
went out with her nephew lol, i havent seen her in 2 years
and i dont know its weird how it all turns out. cuz his
family knows my uncle and cousin and i look back and i go
its all my fault that were together cuz if i would of never
kissed him that day on april 17th none of this would of
happened. but anyway im gonna go finsh lundry and take a
shower and do my hair and makeup and blah blah blah!