Fuckyouthatsmyname

The abyss gazes also
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2002-09-22 07:25:29 (UTC)

i didnt mean for this entry to turn into a drug lecture, but that's how it worked out

oh man

"dear diary"


(i came back and edited this so i could put this in. i want to first
and foremost say that me being a recreational drug user does not make
me a bad person. it doesnt make me a loser or mean that i am somehow
fucking up my life. i fuck up my life without drugs. it doesnt change
the good person i am, nor is it a reason for a girl not to like me or
a friend to stop being a friend. it's not a big thing in my life and
it shouldn't be monumental in anyone's life. if the only thing you
can find in this world to live for is drugs then i guess you are
better off dead. i like drugs, yes. when it comes to e pills and
shrooms, i am not someone who does them all the time. i havent had
shrooms in months and i have rolled once in prolly like a year. i
still like doing them, but it's not worth the effort to try to track
them down for a few hours of goofiness. it is a much better
expeirience when you reserve them for special occasions. it's like
when my buddy steve chester comes to visit. i never get to see him
anymore and the guy is my best friend. we have had alot of bonding
expieriences and learned alot from doing drugs together. when he's
around i want to trip with him, watch some flicks and have a good
fucking time. i like pot and beer and i dont even drink as much as i
would like. i don't even like to smoke with other people. i like to
smoke later at night a few hours before i hit the sack. i watch
movies,sometimes i write, it's just my time to veg out and a period
of release. i HATE being high around girls i like, i don't want a
pothead girlfriend because we would both just be dumb around each
other. i do not like party girls. i like girls who like to lay with
me on my couch and don't care that i read comic books. please ladies,
give pothead mike a chance. you don't ever hear anyone who smokes pot
critisize someone who doesnt. i have heard too many times about how
someone does drugs and they are automatically dogshit. remember: it
takes different strokes to move the world and it takes all sorts of
different people to make up a whole world. you don't have to like
everything about me, and you dont have to approve. but you do have to
let it slide if you dont agree.)


i am the dopest of the dope show niggas. i can't do
anything right and nothing can work out the way i plan on
it. what the fuck am i doing anyways? these last few weeks
have been rough and the next two months are going to
fucking kill me. i have been going to bed when the sun
comes up for nearly a year now. i have been trying to get
back to sleeping at night but shit never works the way i
would like it to. plus no one ever has any pot. maybe
that's a good thing because weed gets me into too much
trouble. Hey, no one talks to me anymore so maybe someone
didnt hear that I GOT MY DAD'S CAR IMPOUNDED ON THE WAY
HOME FROM EIGHT BLOCK LIKE A FUCKING ASSHOLE! and no i did
not buy from an undercover cop, roupe, you stupid fuck. i
bought off a dirty nigger who INFORMS the cops so he can
keep makin money. it's not like im that fucking stupid.
well.....i guess i really am that stupid. i'm a smart guy,
really i am. i even have my share of common sense, but i do
stupid things.

onwards and upwards, i am starting college in a few months.
pray for me. this means i get to go to two schools and work
three jobs, and i don't even get any fuckin money for it.
because after getting bitch slapped i have to pay 1000 for
the car. what the fuck is wrong with me? i could have
bought my own fucking car for that much. and even if it
died after a week of driving it, it would still have been
better than paying a grand for nothing. they are having a
vote in canada to see if they wanna legalize weed. the last
paper i wrote sophmore year was about legalizing the
devil's weed. being someone who dabbles in drugs, it really
just baffles me how it can be illegal. that's like
outlawing sex (which they do in some places). there is
nothing wrong with it. someone tell me ONE thing that pot
does to you thats harmfuk. let's try to think about this
logically, shall we, even those who dont do any drugs can
probably understand where im coming from and maybe not
judge me or disassociate with me just because i like to get
high.

if you believe in god then you already have to drop your
anti marijuana beliefs because IN THE BIBLE god says that
he gave us everything that has a seed for us to use and
enjoy. hmmmm, does pot have seeds? yeah. does it grow
naturally from the earth? yes, i think it does.

secondly, what harm am i doing to the world or the people
in it if i am smoking a joint on my back porch? the only
reason that marijuana was made illegal was because mexicans
used to traditionally smoke it. back in the day when people
were xenophobic (like they arent now?) they made it illegal
so they could use it as a way to deport the mexicans. what
a great country and world.

we all should know that the government does allow a certain
amount of drugs into the country and they make money off of
it as well. we know that people arent going to stop doing
drugs. prohibition was a disaster and so is the war on
drugs. ask anyone who has done any research on it and they
will tell you that it is a huge failure. drug use in
countries that have legalized drugs have gone DOWN. because
kids do what they arent suposed to, and they arent suposed
to smoke pot.when it's not illegal anymore it's not
the "cool" things to do. i smoke pot to get high goddammit!
if we legalize and regulate drugs, EVERYONE WINS. the
government taxes it, they get money. the FDA regulates it
so you dont have people buying e pills that can kill them.
prices drop, new jobs are created and people get buzzed.
let's think for a moment how many people have died from
smoking pot. uh....none. now i'm not saying we should
legalize crack and heroin but we might as well, because
people will do it no matter what the laws say. this way
they can do it and at least be relativly safer.

listen i am tired or babling about pot, drugs are not a big
deal in the grand scheme of things and this just makes me
sound like a have a hard on for any and all drugs. my drug
of choice is pot, i love the shit and i am responsible when
i use it. i'll eat some shrooms and some e pills because
they make you feel good for god's sake. ecstasy makes you
ecstatic, what's bad about that. it opens up your feelings,
you bond with friends and it gives you a positive outlook
on life. i think more clearly and consciencly when i eat
good shrooms, they put nothing but good ideas and great
opinions and philosophy in my head. next time i trip i am
going to have a notebook by my side because you can't even
believe how many insightful and hope filling things i think
of. why are things that make people happy illegal? fuck
america.

in conclusion, it is not the drugs that fuck you it is the
laws against the drugs that fuck you. a little bag of weed
didnt take my dad's car and tow it to an impound lot, the
fucking cops did. i am moving to canada when i turn 19 so i
can drink and smoke all i fucking want.


here comes the song, i guess it might as well be about drugs

i don't like eminem and thet dont have a fucking hold on me

hahahahahaha, hit it


Back when Mark Wallburg was Marky Mark
This is how we used to make the party start
We used to mix in with Bacardi Dark
And when it kicks in you can hardly talk
And by the sixth gin you gon' probably crawl
And you'll be sick then and you'll probably barf
And my prediction is you gon' probably fall
Either somewhere in the lobby or the hallway wall
And everything's spinnin'
You're beginning to think women are swimmin in pink linen
Again in the sink
Then in a couple of minutes that bottle of Guinness is
finished
You are now allowed to officially slap bitches
You have the right to remain violent and start wildin'
Start a fight with the same guy that was smart eyein' you
Get in the car and start it and start drivin
Over the island and cause a 42 car pile up

Earth calling, pilot to co-pilot
Looking for life on this planet sir, no sign of it
All i could see is a bunch of smoke flyin
And I'm so high that I might die if I go by it
Let me out of this place I'm outta place
I'm in in outter space, I've just vanished without a trace
I'm going to a pretty place now where the flowers grow
I'll be back in an hour or so

Cause every time I go to try to leave (Whoa)
Somethin' keeps pullin on my sleeve (Whoa)
I dont wanna but I gotta stay (Whoa)
These drugs really gotta hold on me (Whoa)
Cause everytime I try ta tell 'em no (Whoa)
They won't let me ever let 'em go (Whoa)
I'm a sucker all I gotta say (Whoa)
Is drug's really gotta hold on me?

In third grade all I used to do
Was sniff glue through a tube and play rubix cube
Seventeen years later I'm as rude as you
Schemein on the first chick with the hugest boobs
I got no game and every face looks the same
They got no name so i don't need game to play
I just say whatever I want, to whoever I want
Whenever i want, wherever I want, however I want
However I do show some respect to few
This ecstacy has got me standin next to you
Gettin sentimental as fuck, spillin' guts to you
We just met but I think I'm in love with you
But you're on it too so you tell me you love me too
Wake up in the morning like "Yo what the fuck we do?"
I gotta go bitch, you know I got stuff to do
Cause if I get caught cheatin then I'm stuck with you
But in the long run these drugs are probably gonna catch up
sooner or later
But fuck it I'm on one so let's enjoy
Let the X destroy your spinal chord,
So it's not a straight line no more
So we walk around lookin' like some windup dolls
Shit stickin' out of our backs like a dinosaur
Shit six hits won't even get me high no more
So bye for now I'm gonna try to find some more

Cause every time I go to try to leave (Whoa)
Somethin' keeps pullin on my sleeve (Whoa)
I dont wanna but I gotta stay (Whoa)
These drugs really gotta hold on me (Whoa)
Cause everytime I try ta tell 'em no (Whoa)
They won't let me ever let 'em go (Whoa)
I'm a sucker all I gotta say (Whoa)
Is drug's really gotta hold on me?

That's the sound of a bottle when it's hollow
When you swallow it all
Wallow and drown in your sorrow
And tomorrow your probably gonna wanna do it again
What's a little spinal fluid between you and a friend,
screw it
And whats a little bit of alcohol poisoning?
And whats a little fight?
Tomorrow you'll be boys again
It's your life live it however you wanna
Marajuana is everywhere, where was you brought up?
It don't matter as long as you get where you're goin'
Cause none of this shit's gonna mean shit where we're goin
They tell you to stop but you just sit there ignorin'
Even though you wake up feelin' like shit every morning
But your young you got a lot of drugs to do
Girls to screw, parties to crash, sucks to be you
If I could take it all back now I wouldn't
I would've did more shit that people said that I shouldnt
But I'm all grown up now and upgraded
And graduated to better drugs and updated
But I still gotta a lot of growin' up to do
I still gotta whole lot of throwin' up to spew
But when it's all said and done before I know it
I'll be forty with a forty on the porch tellin stories
With a bottle of Jack, two grandkids on my lap
Babysitting for Hailey, while Hailey's out gettin shmashed

Cause every time I go to try to leave (Whoa)
Somethin' keeps pullin on my sleeve (Whoa)
I dont wanna but I gotta stay (Whoa)
These drugs really gotta hold on me (Whoa)
Cause everytime I try ta tell 'em no (Whoa)
They won't let me ever let 'em go (Whoa)
I'm a sucker all I gotta say (Whoa)
Is drug's really gotta hold on me?

Cause every time I go to try to leave (Whoa)
Somethin' keeps pullin on my sleeve (Whoa)
I dont wanna but I gotta stay (Whoa)
These drugs really gotta hold on me (Whoa)
Cause everytime I try ta tell 'em no (Whoa)
They won't let me ever let 'em go (Whoa)
I'm a sucker all I gotta say (Whoa)
Is drug's really gotta hold on me?

Drugs really got a hold on me
Really got a hold on me
Cause drugs really got a hold on me
They really got a hold on me


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