while he is away
2001-01-19 13:04:31 (UTC)

we ll this is my first entry i..

we'll this is my first entry i really don't know why i am
starting this i guess because it is more private than
having a written diary that someone can get there hands on.
we'll tommy has been gone for a little over a week and i am
so lonely,last time was nothing like this time i mean last
time he went over seas i wasn't really use to being with him
but now i am.the highlight of my day i when he came home
from work and now i have nothing to lookfoward too it sucks
but i have to stay strong for william he need mommy to keep
it together.
i m trying so hard to stay strong and i have been strong i
only cried the day he left but i think by me trying to be so
strong it is taking it's toll on me i feel like i am going o
break down and cry and never stop.
tommy is a wreck he dosn't want to be over seas at all he
just wants to be home with us,i think it is so fair that
marines have to be away from their families all the time
it's just not fair,william is 17 months old and tommy has
only been in his life for 10 months that is so unfair to
both of them it breaks my heart in the morning when willim is
in his crib welling for dada to get him out so they can do
ther morning ritual eating captain crunch in the middle of
the living room.
i miss everything about him even his snoaring as much as i
bitch about it i wish more than anything that i could hear
his snoaring right now but his out somewhere out on the
godamn deep blue sea god knows where.
he will be in gwam in a few days so i hope he calls which
he most likely will,i want to hear his voice so bad but
more than anything i want to hold him but the good thing
about this deployment is tis is his last than he is out.and
we can actually live without worrying about the next time
he has to leave and god am i looking foward to that.
we'll thats all for now i will write tommrow