Heartpiece12

Ambitious Intentions
2002-09-15 05:44:41 (UTC)

Laci is awesome

Tonight Laci helped me dry my tears....lets hope its one of
the last times i cry over this cause i have been for the
last week...ive been struggling with it the past
month....and i havent liked it since the past year... it is
my church...my church has changed...It is Catholic and
sorry to say but right now i dont like it... and im not
liking my religion cuz of the people at the church....
things have changed and i feel as if i dont belong
anymore.. but when i go to Jennifer, Travis' and Laci's
church its diffrent.... suddenly its all the sudden
peaceful...i love the music, i love the devos and i love
the people and i love the lessons and i love what i learn..
i learn so much more there than my church...my church is
hidden with a more complicated message that i try to peal
apart trying to get to the core but never am able to get to
it... but when im at Lacis church its diffrent... for once
i feel like im doing something right...for once im not
really dreading church... last week i dont think i told u
guys cuz i was pretty hurt but i got kicked out of chior..
i have been going to Jennifers church and camps all this
time and not my own and then all the sudden i go back to my
church and they told me that they r looking for a more
continous person and that they thought it was unfair if i
joined after like not being here for two months when other
girls asked if they coul join chior and they wanted a
better ratio of boys and girls... once again ive had one
more thing cut from me and my faith....im hanging on to my
faith by a mere string and nothing more....right now i dont
know if i want to even go back to my youth group part of
the church... My mom said she thinks im making a mistake
and thats one reason why she doesnt like me going to
jenifers church and another big one is becuz she swore and
promised in to the catholic church and my dads real mom
(who is now dead) that she would raise me catholic...i just
got done with a talk with Laci and she helped me out a
bunch. Im going to Logan and Travis' bible study run mile
thing ...tonight i asked my parents if i couldd go to the
mile run thing tomorrow and at forst my dad was like "
Julia we r not church of christ..." and then finally they
said i could go but either way i had to go to catholic
mass...

tomorrow i go to the mile run and i hope to get something
out of it from God to tell me what to do... I dont know
what to do right now but I hope i know soon..




Ad: