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2002-09-13 22:01:58 (UTC)

IN DA "A".........

I'm at home right now....I just had to come home and chill
out a little. I just thought I'd hit this thing up. Well,
everything is going good. I had my first two exams.....I
don't really have much to say about them until I get a
grade. College isn't really hard. I think the challenge is
being able to manage your time wisely and keep yourself
motivated. I've found that you can only push yourself and
if you think people you hang w/ will help you out.....THINK
AGAIN! I love the girls I hang w/.....KeKe, Alexis, and
Glynn.....I love 'em to death.....but for the sake of me, I
have to be solo sometimes. I kinda feel like they are
holding me back....or I was holding myself back by being w/
them. They definitely aren't "talk about it, be about it"
females. I've found that they say one thing, but do
another. So, I trip out w/ them and I talk to them if
anything is on my mind. Yeah, they are there for me when I
need them.....but everything that is on my heart to do,
they aren't up to it, so therefore, I gotta do things on my
own. I've been catching Marta by myself....going to the gym
by myself. Solo is the only way to be....ya know! My
roommates are cool. At first, I was kind of skeptical about
it, but things are coming along nicely. I would like to
hang out w/ them more often. Farrah is cool, but she does
her own thing a lot, but I now understand why....it's cool.
Victoria is very quiet, but she is down for anything. Ebony
is the type of female that I would hang w/ though. We see
things kinda alike. We all get along and I'm blessed that
everything turned out that way. Ya know! Anyway, I got this
boy liking me. I hate how it is though. First of all, he is
NOT my type. He is really deep in it too. He keeps saying
all this stuff about the seed being planted and all it
needs is time to grow......WTF!.....little does he know,
this female ain't nothing but concerte, so nothing can be
planted here! I'm sorry, but in the beginning I told him
how it was, but he still gotta try. It is really urking my
nerves because I'm sick of people telling me about how he
be talking about me. GET OVER IT! I'm not the one! Then,
I'm meeting other dudes.....they ain't nothing but simps.
What gets me is that they always gotta brag about what they
got or what they are about to coop......I DON'T CARE! To
make matters worse is that after they sit and brag about
what they got, they then have the audacity to say that they
are sick of females only wanting them for what they
have......once again, WTF! Maybe if you stop going around
telling every female that you meet what you have in your
pocket/wallet, then you wouldn't meet those who only seek
to dig. But that's what they be wanting anyway....keep
playing w/ me like that and I will play the role and take
whatever you throw out there....then I'll act like I don't
know you the next time I see you on the streets. Niggas are
so stupid and blind. If you put yourself out there, then
you ain't doing nothing but setting yourself up to let a
petty ass female or hoe-like nigga be your downfall. It's a
trip! But anyway, I'm not looking for anyone to really talk
to. I see a lot of attractive dudes, but knowing how most
of them are superfical and lack personality, I don't even
let what they say to me sink in. In the left ear and out
the right! I see these chicks looking everyday for someone.
I just see it like this: What's worth it, will come to me.
I shouldn't have to look for anything. It will be placed
before me. Ya know! I got school to worry about.....who
cares about these hoe-acting niggas!?! But anyway, I
haven't changed who I am. I will always be the person you
knew me as before and after everything. I'LL HOLLA