charismachick

suprisingly, it all ends well
2002-09-12 06:31:14 (UTC)

confusion (but things can't be that bad)

i was with this guy Mike,(typical start of a teenage diary-
either angst, or problems with the opposite sex)
great guy, got along well with the family, we had fun,
always honest. but old habits are hard to break. along
comes another guy, Richard, longtime crush good friend too,
i thought i was over him but as soon as he shows signs of
reciprocation i was screwed... saturday night it was mike
vs. richard but they didn't know it. i think i screwed up
and lost both of them...
but ive got other problems and i still haven't had
sufficent sleep since the weekend so im over caring. mike
and i will still be friends, even though we never see each
other, mike and i... well he told me he loved me saturday
night... a bit suss... and i think that he may have just
wanted something he couldn't have, so now that im
available... oh, and i kissed mike in front of him sat
night after i told richard i liked him, so that probably
wasn't such a great move either (oops!) but its not a
tradgedy.
my primary teacher, basketball coach, netball coach, fellow
basketball player is dying of ovarian cancer, it kind of
puts things in perspective for you. i saw her on tuesday,
she is pale and shrivelled and i am at loss to know how
such a lively and strong person can be drained by this
unseen predator. i haven't cried since then, but i am
now... im waiting for a miracle, but it won't come.
so that's why im not worrying about ricahrd or mike,
because im young, and they can take care of themselves and
i have other priorities.
i am going to see my best friend on saturday, i can't wait
to catch up with her.
but right now im flying.
cheers darling,
x




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