married and lonely

ok , i have never keep a dairy..

ok , i have never keep a dairy be for so forgive me if
it sounds dum, i just needed to have some thing to let out
all my thoughts , you see me and my husbon have been
togather for 9 years married 6 of them. and the last 4 have
been hell, see he don't care about how i feel or what i
think , he never touches me , or even kiss's me anymore. he
used to not be like that, and now i find myself falling in
love with on of our frinds, i try not to think of it but
its hard becase he told me he feels the same, don't get me
worg i am still in love with my husbon , and he is in love
with his wife, we have not done anything, not even kissed.
but we do feel. i don't know, ijust don't know what im
going to do. we bouth have kids that we love with our lifes
and would do nothing to put them though what we went though
in our lifes, i mean a broken home. and we don't want to
lose our other hafes, we just want to know that we are
wanted and he does that for me as for my husbon he don't.
and his wife don't . i stay deprested all the time and
can't remember the last time i was truly happy. and when he
is around he makes me feel good about my self.