Visions Of Life
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2002-09-07 00:13:40 (UTC)

Another Thing I DO NOT Recommend

Never ever ever take 31 sleeping pills at once then add 8
mystery pills. This ranks up there with the never take
ipetac syrup rant..

So anyways.. I was quite fucked up.. And somehow i was
allowed to operate a vehicle.. now i cant even speak or
walk but i drove across the street. Once i had my stuff i
couldnt find my 9 dollars.. So i stumbled to my car..
Couldnt find money.. couldnt find my keys.. Look for like
10 minutes then go inside. He has my keys.. i think he
thought i was a drunken fool. So i stumble back home. I
guess i walked in, went into the bedroom and never shut the
front the door.. I was having issues. I would mix words
like say glasses instead of keys. Words were not coming out
right. I kept blacking out. I did want to die at the time
tho. Too bad i didnt have alcohol. I also cut my wrist in
the right places to kill myself but im too much of a wus to
cut deep.

The reason for all of this. I did write a hysterical entry
the other day or whenever but i deleted it. We had a
horrible fight and he said he was moving out and leaving
me. I was hysterical. The next morning he felt the same
way. Tho by the time he came home he said he wasnt going to
leave me because he loved me too much. So i felt better. I
slept 27 hours out of 30. The last 2 days ive had a flu
kind of thing so ive been feverish and hallucinating and
weak and numb. I havnt worked in 2 days. Last night he
hugged me when he came home and was worried because i was
burning up. I went back to bed. He seemed a little distant.
This morning and afternoon he seemed fine. He wanted to
take care of me and cook me dinnerand all of that but had
to work. So i think all is good now..