oopsydaisies2

Diary
2002-09-04 18:09:23 (UTC)

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I can't live with or without you. It's so true in my case.
I'm so sick of this ride.
To the object of my affection,
I wish you felt for me one half of what I feel for you. I
know it can never be the way I want things to be, but I
close my eyes to the obvious. I love, you don't. I want,
you don't. I sacrafice, you don't. I still believe, you
don't. Why? What more do you want? I don't think you'll
ever be satisfied or truely happy. Maybe I'm not the one
for you...but you were the one for me. Life can be so cruel
sometimes. If I could never see you again and I had one
last chance to talk to you, I'd tell you that no matter
what happens or how you've hurt me or how you've never
really understood me...you'll always be a part of me. It
hurts. So many can say they love you...maybe they do, but
no one will understand how much you mean to me. I think
it's something different than love. It's a mutual respect
and need. But I'm tired of being both sides of this
relationship. I wish I could voluntarily walk away, but I
can't...yet.
I live my life one day at a time, thinking tomorrow will be
different or better. But I know miracles don't happen. No
matter how much I want this...it's still only me that wants
it. So I continue to suffer quietly while you walk unaware.
Love, me.




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