My life
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2002-09-02 22:57:12 (UTC)

*Trying to Move On*

ok..ive been thinking a lot lately, about having a
boyfriend and moving on. And i decided that I wanted to be
with Krueger. I dont know how well thats going to work out.
Because i've only loved 2 people in my life, Brant n
Krueger. And Krueger was the first person to break my heart
after that Brant did about 1000 times. So basically i have
guy trust issues, because of those two guys. But there is
this guy named Tim, really sweet, not the hottest guy but
his personality makes him hot. And he told me last night
that he likes me and he would ask me out but he dosent no
how much longer he is going to be living in GB, that right
there scares the shit out of me because what if he asks me
out and i start to fall for him and he moves. That is just
going to be one more guy on the list..So I dont know what
to do. Me and Brant are just friends, like were actually
friends which is good because thats what i need. I took
down everything in my room that reminded me of him. I feel
better. Theres a lot of guys that i could consider trying
to be with but theres something in the way so its
pointless. ya know? I think that i should stop worrying
about guys, and relationships and worry about school. But
thats hard when there are guys in my school. AHH i hate
this! I talked to brant last night and he was like why
werent you at seville? that kinds surprised me because i
figured he wouldnt notice if i was there or not there.
Thats the kinda person he is sometimes. And that kills me
but oh well im use to it. I got so drunk last night, i dont
know why i did, I think that it was becuase i was sick of
worrying about my problems, i went off on Danny, IM SO SICK
OF HIM AND HIS SHIT, i mean ya he cares about me and he
worries about me and thats sweet and all but i mean enough
is enough, i feel like a bitch abotu it but i knwo how
brant feels so ive given him enough space. but i gotta go
im going to try and write everday, love ya