Life as I know it.
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2001-07-19 06:55:51 (UTC)

Ruby Tuesday

okay matt so you read this so fucking what? If you dont
like what you see there is a simple solution dont read this.

Today was a good day caught up with a lot of my friends
basically...didnt have much to write an entry about until a
certain someone left me feedback, oh and im sure you know
who it all was.

So did you know im psychotic? Yeah, thats what I was
told. Girls you know what its like after a break up and
you all know im acting how every other girl acts once she
has been dumped.

Oh and get this--he told me *gasp* there is no chance we
will get back togeter.........oh my gosh i am going to die
now, oh woe is me, what am I ever gonna do with out him?
Wait Im doing just fine without him, actually im happy for
once. He did me a favor by breaking up with me then
basically using me for an easy piece of ass after the
fact...cause I realize that he truly is an asshole and I do
deserve better. I miss the good times sure I do, I also
miss the good times i have had with my other ex's but now i
realize why he is like all my other ex's--treating me like
some substandard human being who doesnt have feelings other
than love for him. LIke Im not "allowed" to hate my
ex's...what the fuck ever, I do. Cause hey were ex's for a
reason. SOme I hate more than others like the infamous
boyfriend before Matt I truly hate him, I cant even hear
his name without rage taking over. And cause I was blinded
by love i thought matt would be different. IM dumb like
that. Im sure he feels the same towards me, but do I care?
NO cause he is the past, as i said to him,I miss what we
HAD not what we have, I have a better relationship with the
sombrero man than I do with Matt now...and I always say if
you're not happy with a situation you can always change
it....so im changing it, im sick of basically remembering
how he was when we went out, im concentrating on what he
truly is now, an asshole. And you know what? Its working,
im moving on a lot faster than I thought I would have.