*~?~* Amy's Journal *~?~*
Ad 2:
2002-08-28 18:00:00 (UTC)

1:12 PM thoughts so far.....

Alrite once again I got like 3 hours of sleep....ya I know
I really need sleep cause like in the last 2 days I have
like 5 hours of sleep and I feel like I am gonna pass out
rite now,but I tired to go back to sleep 2day after I woke
up,but I couldn't....Grrrr....

anyways...on to last nite...thinking I am gonna get like
major sleeping done...I was about to sign out of msn when
my sisters friend signs in and starts to talk to me
about...about SUICIDE....well now most of u know about me
and how I wanted to do the same thing,but for a totally
different reason.This "friend of my sisters",not gonna
mention any names,was telling me how one of her other
friends wanted to kill themselves,because they were being
made fun of so bad.Like ok pple,if u don't like sumone I
repsect that,but don't go and harass them about their
faults,and misfortunes makes them feel really
bad,and well this how most kid/teen suicide happen.Alrite
it just pisses me off.But really who can you blame,the kid
that is making fun of her,the parents of the kid who is
making fun of her for not teaching the kid that its wrong
to judge pple like that,the person who is being made fun of
because they care to much what other pple think,or the
parents of kid that being made fun of because they didn't
each their kid to have high self-esteem,and to not care
what other pple think.I know I am probably gonna get a
million messages about what I just worte saying I am wrong
for even thinking that,and it is always the kid and thier
parents that are making fun of kids who are to blame.But
really I dunno about that...its just my opinon and I am
entitled to it so whatever...anyways...and yes I know I am
not the one to be talking about making fun of pple,but I
hate to admit but yes I did sumthin to sumone in grade
8,that I shouldn't have,and yes the person had forgiven
me,and I found out like a week and half ago this person
wanted to kill themselves because or partly because of what
I did to her.But I have learned my lesson,and do I do the
same thing now No...but back to the moral of this
crazy shit that pple probably laugh @ me for and shit,but
do I really care what they think no,I like me and I like
the stuff I do,and I don't really care what other pple
think,if they don't like me for me,then they can go to hell
4 all I care.As for suicide its STUPID and EASY for a way
out,trust me I know,I have been there and figured it out
for myself,so take my word on it,and 2 pple really close me
have gone threw the same shit,one of very good friends
tried to actually kill herself 2 weekends ago.And in case
anybody cared anybody mentioned in the story is ok,and
getting help if they needed it.

anyways,brighter topic but still part of the reason y I
didn't get hardly any sleep last nite...its like 4am by the
time I get done talking to my sisters friend rite....and
Dave was already I go to get in bed...and I
wake him anyways...I just basicly lyed
in his arms talking about all this suicide that is going
on...and I fell asleep...but I get woken up at like sumone knocking on my bedroom door...I was about
to throw my damn lava lamp at the person when they walked
in the door...but it was Jim with breakfast for me and
Dave,so we ate...then he was like lets go,I was like where
are we going,I ain't going anywhere...I am going back to
sleep damn it.But he made me get up,and he took me for a
walk on tha beach,which we ended up at 1 of my fav lil
places (around here anyways) which is a lil spot the
beach,and we sat there for like 20 mins
and "talked" ;).....LoL...anyways
I guess he had it all planned out and shit...and it was I guess it was worth not sleeping once
again.And Thanx Jim your awesome...and the strawberries
weren't burnt they were just was
amazing Jimmy...u should be a chef...LoL...wait no u
shouldn't didn't u almost burn down my house
once..LoL...and yes Dave we both owe him for this one!

once again moving sister looks like a lil
whore clown,cause she dyed her hair pink,its really bad,but
I guess she just luvs it,but ahhh wouldn't be my choice,but
its her hair she can do whatever she wants with it...LoL.. I think I am gonna go lay down,cause I just
really don't feel good,and Dave is still here,yeah we're
going to lay down,and I will probably be back 2nite
again,cause you know how many thoughts I can think up of in
like a matter of an just think of a couple

~*¤*~ Amy ~*¤*~