my CraZee Lyph
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2001-07-17 09:21:27 (UTC)

stupid GuYs

well so much has gone on in my life...especially with
guys. i swear they're nothing but trouble when it comes
down to it. they're there to make you laugh & smile, but
in the end they're also there to make you cry & frown. i
can't necessarily say that i've been through EVERYTHING
with a guy because i'm only 17, but what i can say is that
i've been through an enormous amount of ish with them.
i've had the good times with them & i've had the bad times
with them. i don't know why guys mess up when they're with
me if i give them all they want. it doesn't make any sense
at all. but thats them and some like to take for granted
what they have. i guess i am glad to have found someone
that makes me happy when im around him and makes me feel
good. but you know whats weird that i've noticed?
whenever i'm single, it seems like nobody wants to talk to
meeh...but whenever i'm taken up, it seems like EVERYBODY
wants to get with meeh it seems. it drives me crazy. and
theres SoOoOo much temptation. but you know, with this
relationship that i'm in now, i feel so bad because of what
i've done to him in which he isn't aware of. i cheated on
him 3 times and talk to other guys on the phone. it's not
like i slept with them, but other things that were done on
me...to me. get it? but its bothering me so much because
i never cheated on a guy before and im honest in my
relationships...i want to let him know what i've done but i
know it'd ruin things. another thing that's been getting
to me is Sio. I've known this boy for 3 years now and
every time we get together at a party we act like we're
together but afterwards we never call eachother. so we
only see eachother 2 weeks out of the whole year. well i
seen him at his bday party and he was all over me even
though i told him i was taken up...he was trippin and was
still tryin to get into my pants like no other. the boy
had my hands together in just ONE of his hands while he was
doing other things with that other hand. but he finally
stopped and we were talking. he told me that he loved me
(this was 2 weeks ago) and that he always has. i don't
know. its hard for me though. okay im done typing...my
fingers hurt LoL


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