bernadette

hugz n kizes
2002-08-25 13:57:18 (UTC)

as it turns out, I wanted to..



as it turns out, I wanted to write something beautiful
today. I don't know why I'm so out of it today. The words
just wouldn't come to me. It's like I am sitting here in
front of my PC monitor trying to come up with a wonderful
beginning for this! Nothing seems to come. Bummer!
What comes to mind are songs I like. And that doesn't count
a lot coz I couldn't start reflecting on it also. I wdn't
know if I would get the words right. This just stinks. Its
like you wanted to do something and you're just not in the
right mood.

Neways, I was talking to Son a while ago on the phone. i
suddenly asks him if it's ok if i describe him. he asked me
in what way i
would like him to describe me. (Coz there are many ways to
describe a person y'know--physically, or what I see him to
be inside which comes to fore on the outside which in turn
would make him a more beautiful person once I describe him
like that..Oh well, I hope you get my drift..)And i said
physically. So i started to describe him. I said that he's
ok
to look at. good looking but not perfect. what attracted me
most when I first saw him. I
said it was his smile. And it was really his smile...He has
this really wonderful smile that opens up his face and puts
a little mischievious twinkle in his eyes. And I love his
eyes . Then he suddenly became quiet..End point, he
suddenly
remembered his ex..It was the first time I heard him talk
about her . And I am so sad---not
jealous--just sad that he still gets fustrated whenever she
pops into his head and remembers the things they once
shared
and the awful thing she'd done to him. I swear it on my own
grave that if I really get the chance to meet her, I'd tell
her point blank that she's really one stupid girl .I'd tell
her face that she was a stupid fool for letting go of
someone as special as Son. He who's only fault was to love
her so much as if there wasn't any other woman left on
earth to ever love. For hurting him that bad. And how I
would give up anything and everything that i have right now
to be able to be loved like that by Son. How I do crave for
that. And she was an utter fool to just let it slip off her
fingers.


When you're with me, I'm free. I'm careless. I believe.
Above all the others, we'll fly. This brings tears to my
eyes. My sacrifice." - Creed

I just love that song. Well, it pretty much explains all.

-hugz n kizes-




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