Jessica T.

how i see life...
2002-08-18 16:20:29 (UTC)

true self

i've been going to a lot of parties lately. or so it
seems. and people obviously are getting drunk and
drinking. the last couple of ones i have just decided to
sit back and observe what is going on. i found myself
almost removed from the social activity. i feel like i'm
floating outside of reality and i'm just an observer not
someone actually there. i was just looking around at the
empty beer cans and other alcholic beverages. they were
everywhere. then i began to think, do people really need
this stuff to have a good time, and the be social??? i
think that some people drink so that they can become
someone else. and wow that is so not cool. that is how
people develope drinking problems. and why is it so bad
to be yourself?
ok don't get mad just yet. i'm not saying that i am just
a guilty as anyone. granted i don't drink every night but
i do do it because i feel different. that is not healthy
and it's pretty sad that it has to take drinking for me to
tell people what i really feel. colleen and i a true
believers that people are their most honest when they are
drunk. i mean that they say what ever they feel because
they don't really care at the point in time. i have done
that on many occasions. like when we were in florence,
italy after the group went to the club. everyone was a
little tipsey and drunk. i just decided to tell my friend
corey that i used to like him. and we totally had this
conversation about it. i am glad i told him, but it took
me some drinks to get me to tell him. i guess when people
are drunk they feel they have nothing to loose and they
have no fear.
the other night at the party one of my friends was totally
trashed and he kept on telling me something. but even
though i believe that people are their most honest being
drunk. i still have a hard time believing him. i think
he was trying to feed me some lines so he could get some.
well just to let him know, he isn;t going to get any. so
you don't need to bullsh*t me.




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