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2002-08-15 14:22:59 (UTC)

I'am Andrew's lost cause...

Dear Me,

I closed my live Journal down because I felt it was only
causing me more distress and pain than it was worth, this
diary is less known so it may have less people to spy on me.

Life has been good to me, though Iam still struggling with
depression and a self defeatest attitude. And there is now
the ? of witchcraft being played upon my mind. It would
explain alot of the happenings of late. I want to be free
of her and the memories of her, yet she haunts me, all I
see is her all I can think of is her and she is always in
my dreams, taunting me, when will it end....

I can't say that I miss Melbourne or the people there, some
of my previous aquiantances have come to me because of the
recent break up between Laura and I, but I still feel
distant to them, my old friends in Perth are more honest
and loving in so many ways from the there Eastern

I hoped when I came to Perth I would find Sharon, but that
was only a hope. She is still in South Korea and probably
very happy, I would hate to interfere in her life once more
but I do wish she was here. I do love her so, her open mind
would be comfort to me now. Still I have seen so many old
faces and I feel new ones are going to grow and become
apart of my new life here.

Ryan is trying to push me in his directions, but maybe he
dosn't know how hard that is. I believe he has his and
perhaps my best intrests at heart, but his obbsession with
money intrests me not. I lack the aggressive motivations
most humans have to succeed in life. Still I have given up
any self destructive thought, it seems to weak when Iam a
fully fuctioning human.

I wonder some times what it would be like to be blind and
what would I see, if I would remember or slowly forget the

Iam Andrew's lost cause...