Andy

The Boy Looked At Johnny
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2002-08-13 16:25:23 (UTC)

Where can I find a girl like that?

I feel like I haven't given the best impression about what
my relationship with Jessy is like, and I think it's
because I've been second-guessing myself so much in these
pages.

It's like this: I like her. I love her, even. We
spend almost everyday together. I enjoy her company
tremendously, enjoy things we do together, enjoy being with
her and sleeping with her. It wasn't so easy at first, of
course: I flailed about a lot mentally, trying to get a
handle on things. I did feel some genuine discomfort. But
we connected pretty well: she isn't really experienced in
this stuff, either, less so than me, anyway -- sort of a bad kisser
at first, truth be told. But she's so-o-o-o-o cool, smart, she's
attractive and stylish. She isn't very emotional, but this is my sole
complaint -- and only because I feel like her non-emotionalism chaffs
against my hyperemotionalism.

Basically, it's just a very good relationship. It's not the
most white-hot thrilling one -- with April, for instance,
every day was either heavenly or hellish, and never any
middle ground, ha ha; and with Roseanne there was an
intoxicating attraction that shattered completely (and
messily) when the relationship ended. Thank god for excessivley level-
headed girls like my Jessy: despite all that, it's probably the BEST
relationship I've ever been in, in the sense that it seems like it
will end well and not in complete hysterics, and if circumstances
were different could probably go on past my requisite 3-month mark. I
mean, who knows, maybe it will, I'm not sure -- but, so it goes,
right? Basically, you know, I feel like it's good.

Jessy, darling, here's to you.


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