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2001-01-12 05:46:15 (UTC)

In order to begin my rant I..

In order to begin my rant I need to tell you some history

I've spent 3 weeks in drug rehab
months in
a halfway
house for
1 week in a
mental institution

Spent my life trying to push the
limits and experience as many things
as I could

Most importantly I have no religious
beliefs whatsoever
Mostly I am a terrible speller and punctuation screwup

you try getting it together after being run over by
2 cars.

My life changed dramatically about 7 months ago when
my wife fell into a deep depression due to stress at work
and the fact that she found out I lied and continued to
smoke pot throughout our 10 year marriage. I'm surprised I
kept the secret that long. The depression in a nut shell
meant I wasn't getting laid for about 2 months. It was in
those 2 months that I reconnected with a childhood friend
named drew. But we'll get back to my tragic life story
later, now let's talk about my dogs.

I have 2 dogs. The second is really the third dog
I've ever had but because the first died when I was 13, the
second dog is now my first dog because we're talking about
alive dogs. So my first dog is really my second except
when the third dog counts as the second being alive. But
for all practicle purposes we'll refer to her as my other
dog or precious. She's only 5 months old and she really is
the third best dog I've ever had. I don't do much of
anything to impress my wife or kids anymore, but I'm able
to get the respect of my first, second and third dogs.
I'm like a walking monument in the dog world.

These magnificent 4 legged creatures that have
collectively decided to align thier entire race with man.
To share the walls of his cave and the luxuries of every
technological advancement he's created. I know in my heart
of heart these little creatures don't understand what the
fuck I'm talking about, ever, but I still continue to speak
with them as if they were the true judge of my humanity.

That thier connection with me somehow fills the void
left by the entrance of the computer and it's ability to
make people feel more secure with themselves and their
personas they portray through these high-fy technological
montitors. After all it takes so much more pot to get
computer to talk to me then it does my dogs. No shit, I
smoke half a bowl and my dogs are right thier talkin to me,
creeping around my feet laughing in thier little gutteral
howl, but it usually takes 2 bowls before I can find peice
and solice in my computer. There's something to be said
about a heart beat.

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