The mediocrity that is me
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2002-08-10 11:44:38 (UTC)

Why does it matter anyway.

How close is it possible for two people to become? I'm not
talking proximity issues here, for all those who were
wondering. Think more along the lines of "intimacy."

I suppose the question that I'm looking for would be "How
well can two people know each other?"

My answer? "Not very well."

As well as you think you know your friends, you'll never
know them as well as they know themselves, and vice versa.
There's those millions of intimate, close moments they've
shared with other people. Millions of memories that you'll
never know about. Billions of little fears, insecurites
and embarrassments that they've experienced......but never
shared. With anyone. Including you. It's the same for
everyone. No one can know you as well as you know
yourself. They can't even come close.

Makes you feel kinda lonely, doesn't it.

It's such a vicious cycle.

Most people I've come across are dying for someone to want
to know them. Literally dying inside, waiting for someone,
anyone really, to make them feel interesting.

"That favourite topic, myself." True to an even deeper
level than I had orginally believed. People love talking
about themselves. They don't want to be self-involved ---
just understood.

It's really all so sad.

Everyone is out there, clumisly groping around in total
darkness, looking for someone who will understand. The
problem is, once you find that other person, all you can
really do is touch. How can that ever be enough?

You can think your best friend knows everything about you.
You can believe that they know you better than you know
yourself. The only person you'll be fooling is you.

But in the end, no one will ever know you as well as you
do. Everyone else has their hands full knowing themselves.

All you'll ever really have is you.

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