Jerkoff Johnny

PhucGawd
2002-08-09 06:51:28 (UTC)

Barbie And Ken Found It Hard To Consumate Their Marriage Without Genitals

hmmm...
well this is me first entry...
i guess the standard thing to do would be to introduce
myself? to my diary? hmmm...
nevermind...
today like everyday began with me being awaken to a dull
pain in my head...this pain wasn't suppressed with the
usual coffee and cancers routine that normally calms me
nerves...nope this morning i was feeling especially lonely
in a full house...but there was no Danny Tanner to tell me
its alrite...or to Cut It Out...hmmm...i used to think that
in everyone's life there was a few great people that bring
the best out of you and complete you...im pretty sure ive
found a couple of those people...but not the one i really
want...you all human existence is consistency...we only
live to perpetuate...were born then were taken care kept
healthy, educated given a job given money buy a home have
some sort of security or stability...just to impress the
opposite sex enough to open their legs and boom weve served
our purpose by fucking and shooting out a little
human...you may be asking yourself then what about homos
and dykes...well theyre the abnormalities...not
retards...homos...by abnormalities i mean it in as much of
a positive way as possible...i really believe that gay
dudes are fucking lucky...and damn near every other day i
wish i was a fag...so now im thinking what was the point of
this random tangent...well john its to support what i have
to say next...i wish people would skip all that...i had a
girlfriend dumped a few monthes ago becuase i wasn't stable
she didn't think i cold give her a secure and monotonous
relationship...that im too chaotic...i just turned 18 at
the time i was trying to finish highschool and she wants
next to marriage...for fucks sake...ever since that
relationship ended...it was all downhill...with rejection
after rejection...the thing with girls...that i think i got
figgered out is this...when youre a girl's friend they
already have what most chicks really want from a
boyfriend...a boyfriend to the chicks ive met are just guy
friends they willing to fuck with...like this one chick Amy
said to me "John, boyfriend and Girlfriends are just fuck
buddies...what we have is much better than that..." so what
she really meant is "Hey Fatass, I like to talk to you, but
I wouldn't lower myself to let you even hold my hand!"...so
i thought that yeah alll this chicks seem to like to hang
out with me cause they can talk to me and oh im so goddam
funny...but they wouldn't go out with me cause "it would be
too weird"...that hey if they want to hang out with me then
id wouldn't be my normal self they get like a fraction of
the Thompsonator (as all losers have somehow dubbed
theselves) and then they'll realize oh shit i miss the fun
john and i guess i like him...but no that didn't happen
they got pissed off at me for being so quiet...you know
like its a bad thing if i feel bad...its weird with my
friends im not really allowed to feeel depressed or if i do
not to show it...because im suppose to be the rock you know
the motherfucking robot with no emotions that just smiles
and tells a good joke every once in a while...so i caved in
and just acted like everything was normal...but this
morning all these pretending and holding it in caught up
with me and i felt like shit...as the day droned on i
lulled into what i termed serene melancholy (calming
soothing saddness because its so fucking familiar)... i got
my usually phone calls...sheri called me chit chatting away
about how her friend christina is a good person even though
she slept with my best friend josh while she was going out
with our other friend Robert...and how Christian (her
boyfriend and one of my good friends) is honorable and
doesnt want to have sex yet cause he's not ready...and she
happy about it because she has someone that doesnt exploit
her slutty tendencies...and my one week ex-Elizabeth called
me from work asking if we could hang out today and lied and
said yes...then my friend will called we went swimming at
angie's house...the cool water...numbed my hurt up for
awhile...thats it my boring day and probly what ill end up
doing tomorrow...hmph...Ms. Holly said if i had more
outlets I'd feel better...i guess we'll see...
"Go Now With The Verb" - Jerkoff Johnny




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