WingsGrl

Rachel's Rantings
2002-08-07 01:04:51 (UTC)

i almost forgot...

ya know, i talked about all this stuff that happened when i
got back, and i neglected all the mark stuff (i'm sure you
all are dying to find out the next chapter in this drama.
so mark NEVER called me after i told him to in my NICE e-
mail! instead, here was the response he e-mailed me:

rach..hey i know i am the worst at keeping in touch with
people but i am for real just busy and I have been in
georgia since thursday and i am here right now till
tuesday...i dont know what to do...you know i care, i am
just bad at being a friend anymore i guess..i dont know, i
will call you when u get back...i just need to relax on
this vacation...

bye
mark

umm, eww! first of all, notice that he didn't answer ANY
of the issues i posed to him in my originial e-mail (except
for saying, "you know i care"-honey, if i knew that i
wouldn't have wasted my time writing that damn e-mail)! i
mean, did he read this thing at all, or just have ALISON
read it to him (since i know they were together in GA, and
she's the only person he seems to have time for!). second
of all, notice he never used the word "sorry!" i mean, i'm
not saying i demand it or something, but if one of my
friends told me that i hurt them, whether i agreed with it
or not, i'd still apologize left and right!!! lastly,
notice how the end of the e-mail is him being all dramatic
and saying he just needs to relax, like his life is so much
more unbearable than anyone elses, and almost annoyed that
i had to interrupt his peaceful vacation with my feelings!
and yet again, i send him an e-mail where i pour my heart
out to him, and he responds with an impersonal piece of
crap! i guess i shouldn't be shocked...like kathleen
said, "that's mark for ya!"

and then, on top of that, i talked to erin last nite and
she said she had talked to natalie who was went out to
dinner with some friends (one of the them being mark-funny,
he has been too busy to call me, yet he has more than
enough time to have a nite on the town-not that i'm saying
he can't spend time with his friends, but i thought i was a
friend too...apparently not). anyway, nat said that he
figured out that i knew his "secret" and he's just scared
to tell me, cuz he said he remembered a bunch of us joking
about zach being gay, and he didn't want to be the butt of
people's jokes. WHA?!?!?! first of all hun, this is yet
another example of your lack of listening skills, cuz if
you had paid attention to me AT ALL you would have made the
fine distinction that i was not making fun of the fact that
zach was gay...i could care less about my friends' sexual
orientation...in fact, as most of my REAL friends know, i
LOVE gay people!! i've been dying for a real gay friend
for how long now?!? we were joking about zach's DENIAL of
being gay, and how, despite his escapades with members of
the same sex, he still claims to be "straight with bi
tendencies"...how can you NOT laugh at that comment?!?!
it's just funny! but of course, mark just sort of hears
what he wants to hear, and thinks that i'm some sort of gay
basher...does he not remember how the FIRST TIME i met him,
i told him how much my fav show was QAF, and how i thought
gay people were so cool and awesome?!?!?! apparently not.
and of course, that was the only thing he said about me at
their dinner. not anyhting about i was hurt cuz he sux at
communication or anything. ugh, i am so sick of this. i
swear, if it wasn't for erin's cool head about all this
(thanks SO much babe for the late nite vent sessions!) i
would have probably blown up and just cut my losses and
ended this sorry excuse for a friendship days ago! guys, i
don't know how much longer i can go on like this! can
someone tell me what i'm doing wrong here?!?! anyone?!




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