Shot

Dirty Fractyl
2002-08-06 15:56:32 (UTC)

last night, dreaming, i learned more about myself than i wanted to

Last night, in my dream, I was given the chance to travel
four years back, without losing the maturity that I suppose
I have gained since I was 17. I was given the chance to be
the only one with an insight of what was going to happen in
a relationship I was in, and was allowed to fix it, and I
did. The joy I felt after doing that in my dream was
cathartic; a burden fell from my shoulders that I did not
even know was there. And then, I awoke, and my life is as
it has always been since that point, and reality sickened
me. I wrote the following poem about it.

"Why cannot the universe fall asleep?"

Time truly heals no wounds;
My faceless beauty gone,
Haunting my empty soul
With fractions of her song.

Enveloped by her love
I let my hatred die
But futility did prove
The fundamental lie.

Distant love, distant child,
My words could not absolve,
When actions were but wild
Your heart I could not solve:
A pure benevolence
stricken with a clause,
Yet one which was fatal
Not subject to God's laws.

Please take creedence, angel,
I've never been a saint;
The part I cannot sell
Has left me here quite faint.




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