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2002-08-05 08:16:08 (UTC)

5th aug

I'm having the blues again. It's probably pms, but oh, i
dunnoe... I have a diary here online, and a notebook which
I bring along with me and try to fill it with my tots
whenever i can. Problem is, I can never seem to finish
writing a decent entry on my notebook. So the entry which I
started on last week has remained till today, half
finished. I had plans today to go cycle to the beach and
then sit down at a bench and start writing away, and when
I'm done, I will cycle all the way back home. But I'm still
here in front of my computer, and I guess it won't be today.
I came back from a trip to this beautiful beach last week.
It was a resorty kind of place. White sand, clear waters,
beautiful marine life, nice place to chill out rather than
to dive. So I went there with this guy (lets call him Mr
Bastard) and another girl whom I didn't noe till we met on
this trip. Dives were great and relaxing. I only dived like
once or twice a day, and the rest of the time was spent
sitting around in the restaurant or at the hammock,
reading, eating, talking.
And then there was this night when there was a party. It
was fun, and I got pretty woozy. Mr Bastard piggy backed me
all the way back to our room which we shared with the other
girl. The girl had disappeared with some guy and she only
came back at 5am in the morn. So I fell asleep on the bed
there and then, and Mr Bastard hugged me from behind cos i
was shivering from cold. Then he started massaging my back,
it felt really good and I didn't stop him. And then he
started to explore and I pretended to be asleep and see
what he would do. When I felt enough was enough, I pushed
him away but he continued to hug me to sleep. I decided to
let it go at that cos we were woozy.
Then on the train ride back, I was reading in my bunk. And
he came in and put his arm around my waist. I ignored him
and told him I wanted to read. He told me to come and look
for him when I'm done. I said ok and went off to sleep
after he left, hoping he will get the idea when i didn't
turn up. Damn, I wish these curtains had locks when he
showed up again while i was sleeping and started to hanky
panky. I drew the line somewhere and pushed his hand away
when he got too far. After a while i realized i wasn't
going to get any sleep with him around, so I got out and I
slept at his bunk instead. hah!

But now I feel all shitty cos I let him touch me. He's the
kind of guy whom I will never ever be attacted to. And I'm
now wondering if I did anything to lead him on. He
subsidised my trip, and if anything, it made me feel like i
owe him which is why i didn't smack him right from the
start. It's sucky cos I let my guard down and he! of all
people had to come and touch me. And then I got all
irritated when he sent this mail to me and some other girls
who were his frens and whom were on the island. He was just
being so fake. And with me being particularly nasty, here
it is for all to see.

A big hello to all my darling "Leng Loys"....

Sorry if I took too long to email, but arriving in
Singapore on Tuesday morning, everything has been a
rushed. I continued to be terribly sick, and had to go see
the doctor. (Good thing she was quite good looking,
heehee... so at least got incentive to go, and managed to
get quite a bit of medicine out of her! hahaha... my charms
still works!)

Now feeling much better, good enough to sit down in front
of the monitor, and type abit more words before relapsing
into coughing spasms.

I would like to thank all 7 of you gals, for making it one
of my best perhentian trip ever! I first went to the island
in 2000 as a customer (with ____ and a few other people),
and went back again in 2001 4 times, and stayed more than
20 days in total, and this year, this was my 4th Perhentian
trip of the year, and I totally love it!

This is also the first time i got such good vis after so
many dives there... ( I think I have done around more than
50 dives at perhentian itself!)

Hope to be able to meet up with you gals soon... either
individually for walks along the beaches, or as a group!
heehee... anyway, for those of u who are keen to get wet
with me, my next dive trip is perhentian 7-9 sep. (will be
doing a personal trip to redang during 9-11 aug, but paying
as a customer, so not sure of vacancy and bookings).

hope to hear from u soon!



the blank in the mail is me. i just deleted the name.
and omigod, i can't help but feel totally irritated with
him for being so fake and disgusting. and omigod! who the
hell cares how many times he's been diving? and wats with
the trying to seek sympathy from us paragraph? and oh gawd.
who wants to go with him for walks on the beach? shit shit
shit. i'm sure if any of the other girls indicate interest
in the trip he's going, he will make it suddenly possible
for them to go with no obstacles like lack of vacancies.

I'm now pretty mean to Mr Bastard. And serves him right for
being such a horny bastard! Never again will he touch me
or he will get boxed square on the face. yeah.. All of you
guys are turning out to be tamadi bastards. And I dunnoe

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