my mixed up world
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2001-07-08 18:49:52 (UTC)


I think I know what I'm going to send John. Last year he
signed my yearbook: "Jesus loves you and so do I. Call me
sometime and we'll have sex." So I'm going to send
him "Call me sometime and we'll have sex" in cut out
letters but instead of how I sent them to Caroline and
Corey, I'll tape them to a piece of paper. This is all
provided he gives me his address. I've been down on the
beach once (it was early night) in all the time we've been
here, since Thursday and it's now Monday. That's sad isn't
it? I've been to the pool twice and the sundeck (after
dark) four times. The rest of the time I've been "hiding"
out in my room and condo. I bet all these kids out here (on
the sundeck after 11pm) think I'm a big dork. Glasses and
all! Maybe I should put my contacts back in, would that
make a difference? They all seem to know eachother and I
know NONE of them. What's happened to me? I used to be so
outgoing! I'm 17, at the beach, surrounded by people, and
completely alone. Damn from far away that guy looks like
Mike, wouldn't that be crazy if that was him! But maybe he
wouldn't want to introduce me to his friends. I am a big
dork after all. But still it's kinda cool to think that it
could be him. I don't know, hopefully I'll find out before
either I go in or he does. I wish my sight was better and I
could really tell. Oh well, I'll move on and maybe if it's
him I'll find out sooner rather than later. It's so damn
cold down here but I'm going to wait to see if I can find
out if that's Mike. It would be cool if he recognized me
but the glasses probably would throw him off. Anyways it
doesn't matter. I've got a cold and do you know how much it
sucks to have a cold at the beach?! More than I can
explain. Ok maybe it's not Mike, but who knows. Why do I
even care? Because it would be a friendly face here where I
don't know anyone. Yeah nevermind it's not him. That sucks.
Hopefully next time I come up here I'll have someone with
me. Then I would do more than sit around the condo doing
nothing. Yeah that could be cool. Matt better get here
quick it's freaking cold up here. (Matt is the security
guy,I've known him for about 3 years, and FYI he's really
hot but he's married) And I bet this isn't making my cold
any better. Boo being sick! This sucks! Matt reopened the
game room and is in there playing ping-pong with some kids
(the ones I was talking about earlier) so I'm going up. I'm

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