voice of a mute
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2002-08-04 03:39:18 (UTC)


3 August 2002

I just returned from camp. It was quite an experience. I
went in very skeptical, even thinking of this "god stuff"
as "bullshit". I closed my ears and my heart to the Lord
at until Wednesday. I don't quite know what inspired a
change in me, well I do know in general, but I can't pin
point it to one specific event. I know that generally
speaking it was the love I saw. The catalytic event may
have been our "share time" friday morning. I still don't
pretend to have all the answers but I have a greatly
renewed sense of the Holy spirit. I feel Him stronger than
I could've ever imagined. To think a week ago I thoughht
this to be a placebo effect.

I still don't know about my beliefs as to Hell, how that
could be justice, but the Spirit tells me its not very
important. I learned this week that Honesty was a very
important virtue. I am not talking aobut telling the truth
to your parents either. I am talking about realizing who
youy are and more importantly who you aren't. The whole
Joey --- however you spell his last name --- analogy
worked. I think that it was James from ventura who brought
it up, but not with certainty. "how you doing" I found to
be a great way to keep myself in check. I found out that I
was not doing well at all.

Music is me greatest release. I believe that the reason I
faded from it was Satan trying to occupy my life with
worthless activities. I need to try to make an effort to
spend more time with my friends from church. It would be
great if I could be more musically involved in something.

I think these are about all my thoughts that I have for
today So I guess I will close this entry tonight.

8:30 P --- and no, I do not care that I made spelling